Celeste Dinucci, who has played a few times with the Flexible Catheters (and was on a team that missed a perfect game by one 50/50 question), has made it into the Finals of the Tournament of Champions on Jeopardy. The finals are a two day affair, tonight and tomorrow night at 7 p.m., so tune in and root her on. Best of luck Celeste!!!

In a startling development today, president George Bush announced something that didn’t sound entirely idiotic. Opening up an express lane for planes over Thanksgiving in unused military airspace will help ease traffic congestion. It really doesn’t sound like a terrible idea. So I just wanted to pay credit where credit is due. After 6 years of non-stop abject failure, today George Bush did something that wasn’t incomprehensibly stupid. Bravo!

Just when I thought that there couldn’t be anything more amazing than the 4:20 news, I stumble onto this little gem. Apparently the Pennsylvania Groundhog wanted to get its picture taken with Paris Hilton last night. No problem, right? Wrong, apparently people have been trying to kill Paris by hiding dynamite in giant rodent heads or something, because they said that the groundhog’s head was a security risk and made him take it off. Then Paris refused to pose for a photo with the Headless groundhog, despite the fact that he had spent $55 on her toilet water. Had the groundhog, at that point, said, “That’s it, b****” and thrown her thru a window, it would have been the greatest thing to ever happen in world history (and yes, I am including fire.)

-Does everyone who works for NBC10 stick their freaking heads in a hole in the ground as soon as they go off the air and keep them there until the next show? I mean seriously, first we had Lori Wilson muffing a line, and now we’ve got this. Coming tomorrow night, NBC10 explores a new fad called “Rap Music”. (Here’s the absolutely priceless video. “I consider myself a relatively hip guy” is one of the greatest lines in tv history. Also,did he steal that “4:20 is the deadliest time of the day” line from “Reefer Madness”?This is, honestly, the greatest local news story I have ever seen.)

-Speaking of deadly marijuana, Ricky Williams might be playing for the ‘Fins against the Eagles on Sunday. Wow, this could get interesting. Also, I’d like to add that it makes perfectly good sense that a guy who occasionally puffs on the lala gets a longer suspension than players that shoot people. I think that is very justifiable. The NFL is a joke.

–It’s things like this that remind us how important and life affirming the intranets can be. You have to see this video. (SFW)

-The other day, after a game Laker coach Phil Jackson said, “We call this a ‘Brokeback Mountain’ game, because there’s so much penetration and kickouts.” Later he said he was sorry, but not before adding, “If I’ve offended any horses, Texans, cowboys or gays, I apologize.” Phil, I am sitting here with a very upset horse. I hope you’re happy. (Link to story here.)

Although quizzo players and fans of Paris Hilton are essentially the exact same demographic, JGT has decided to still hold quizzo tonight, despite the fact that she will be selling her perfume at the same time. “Did we think about canceling the Rendezvous quizzo? Sure. I doubt anyone’s gonna be there. I know for a fact that Darth Ern and the entire Trust Us We Know squad will be in line at Macy’s. But the show must go on.” Goodtimes is expected to be releasing his own fragrance, Quiz Eau, in the near future.

-Regular JGT commenter and former quizzo player Garrett moved to South Korea a few months ago. He seems to like South Korea, but it’s missing something: Quizzo. So he has decided to start his own, at a bar called, remarkably, Phillies. Crazed thought: Quizzo becomes a huge hit in South Korea and word of it’s popularity reaches Pyongyang. Then, in something strikingly similar to ping-pong diplomacy, JGT is called in to host quizzo in North Korea, and finally gets to lay eyes on that crazy hotel and also meet with his idol, Kim Jong Il.

-Think I have a performer lined up for Quizzo Bowl IV. And let me be honest: It’s gonna be amazing.

-In talks with Denver and Seattle about a little 3 city contest next month. Will have more details soon.

-Rumor has it the Minions are returning to the Black Sheep tonight. And what were these murmurs I was hearing from the Inflatable Haggis? Would love to see some old schoolers come back out sometime soon. (including WTF, Missing Heads, Goats, and the Axis of Evil Knieval.)

-Quizzo tonight: Locust Rendezvous at 6:15, Black Sheep at 8 p.m. Hope to see you there! Got a pretty interesting wild card round this week.

-Wish that hip-hop made better use of graphs and charts? WIsh no further my friend. Finally, a number of graphs that explain what “No Barking From the Dog” and “No Smog” Equal if you include a “Breakfast with No Hog”.

-Still don’t have Thanksgiving plans yet? Foobooz has you covered.

-It’s been a rough couple of years for the good ol’ Red, White, and Blue, but finally we have something to hang our hats on: The Clap. We’re getting it in record numbers! Woo-hoo. Good work, gang!

-Bob Ford to Phillies: Open up your freaking wallets and bring Rowand back and this city will make your investment worthwhile. The Phils are at a magical moment – one in which spectacular young talent is crossing the stage in a wonderful ballpark before a fan base that is wildly anxious, dying actually, to reconnect with the game.

Here it is. Youtube kinda makes the quality not as good as I’d like, but you get the idea. If you like it, Digg It. And yes, that’s me getting thrown off the bull.