Today’s page two artice in the Metro is Scary Versus Slutty: Women Divded Over What’s Appropriate Dress for Halloween. Vote in the poll to the right.
Month: October 2006
Halloween Haiku
Alright, in the most convoluted contest ever, yet another twist. I am going to allow haikus to not only be about murder, but about anything Halloween related. So post your Halloween haikus below. Winner of best haiku gets two tix to see Philadelphia Theatre Company’s production of Murderers. 2nd place gets two tix to the Adventure Aquarium in Camden. All entries must be received by Monday, October 30th, at 12 noon.
The Rush Limbaugh quiz
Thought you guys might get a kick out of the wild card round on Thursday. The night’s topic: Rush Limbaugh.
1. Rush is a man who places family values first and is a firm believer in the sanctity of marriage. How many times has he been divorced?
A) 0 b) 1 c) 2 d) 3
2. Rush claims to work for the non existant EIB network. What does EIB stand for?
3. What 12 year old did Rush call the family dog, and then apologized, saying that she couldn’t help the way she looked?
4. Who wrote the book Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Idiot?
5. In 2001, Rush began to go deaf. Deafness can be caused by abusing what drug that Rush has a glorious history with?
6. What popular musician did Rush call a worthless shred of human debris the day after he died?
7. The opening sequence of the Rush Limbaugh show is a song called “My City Was Gone” by this band.
8. Rush dated Daryn Kagan for two years. She’s best known for regularly appearing on what TV station?
***9. When Rush was busted for having 29 Viagra pills, he was returning with several buddies from this Caribbean nation renowned for its sex tourism industry.
10. Like essentially all prominent right wingers, Rush did not serve in Vietnam. He was excused because he had a cyst on what part of his body?
Is the Metro the best paper in Philly?
Me and some friends have been talking about this a lot lately and I thought I’d throw it out there and see what you guys think. I kind of think that The Metro is the best paper in Philly. It’s not where you go for hard hitting news coverage, but it does a much better job of supporting local talent than either the Inky or the Daily News, who are complety convinced that to be worthy of ink you have to be an anchor or reporter on a local news show or have appeared in a reality TV show. Like everybody is just dying to know whether or not Gervase is a good tipper. The Metro, meanwhile, is constantly interviewing local musicians, comedians, and artists, people who are doing exciting things that don’t include appearing on a local network. The City Paper and the Weekly do a good job of this too, but The Metro just seems a little bit more earnest about it. And it’s not as wallowed down in ads as much as those papers are. Anyways, lemme know what you think. I posted a poll to the right.
RELATED: Philebrity interview with Metro A & E editor Dorothy Robinson.
Tiki Barber Throws Smackdown on Crackpipe
I hate the Giants as much as anybody else. But I do love Tiki Barber, for a number of reasons. First, he’s from Virginia and I’m proud to have such a classy guy from my native state. No tirades on the sidelines, no drug abuse, no trashing his teammates. Second, he’s on my fantasy team and scores me tons of points every single week. Third, after Michael Irvin said this week that he was “quitting, not retiring,” the usually mild mannered Barber fired back. He snapped at Gary Myers and Tom Jackson first, then went after Irvin. “That includes the ultimate character guy, facetiously speaking of course, Michael Irvin. Please get a clue on how to be a journalist.” Booyaka shot! Isn’t it great when Crackpipe Irvin tries to attack a guy for lack of character, and the guy, who has more character in his pinky than Crackpipe has in his whole body, fires back? And I would suggest Irvin let the issue slide. Tiki has, honestly, probably a good 50 or 60 IQ points on you (he was valedictorian of his senior class and received an academic scholarship to UVA), so any argument your feeble mind comes up with is gonna be a loss.
Follow up
Here’s some follow up on Rush Limbaugh. You can see Limbaugh not only blasting Michael J. Fox, but acting out his Parkinson’s symptoms. It is really amazing that any of you are even attempting to defend this piece of human waste. This attack comes a couple of weeks after he blamed 15 year old pages for the Mark Foley scandal. Come on, people! There’s a point where this goes past politically incorrect and just goes to out and out evil. Oh, and the anti-stem cell ad will feature none other than Kurt Warner. Now, it is OK to make fun of him.
Those wacky Republicans!
–Rush Limbaugh thinks that Michael J. Fox was “acting” when he displayed the effects of Parkinson’s in a political ad. Hey Rush, were you “acting” when you had that ear problem? Or was that a common side effect of drug addiction?
-Rick Santorum says that a vote for Casey will let the North Koreans think that we are weak on nuclear defense, and will immediately attack us with a nuclear weapon. Then the North Koreans will make our children gay and try to hurt the baby Jesus!
-Speaking of gay, there is a judge in New Jersey who is deciding whether or not gay marriage should be legal. Most of those opposing gay marriage are, of course, Republicans. It’s amazing to me that these guys who wrap themselves so much in the flag think that all Americans are deserving of equal rights under the stars and stripes…except the GAYS! But there is a good reason to not give gays equal rights. I have it on good word that gays love North Korea and they hate freedom! They also hate the baby Jesus!
-Republicans hate Ken Jennings! Ok, so that’s not true, but I figured I’d close out with something more trivia related. Ken Jennings just released a book about trivia, and talks about it at length here. Thanks, Dan, for sending this in.
Murder Haiku Part Deux
Yes gang, I waited and waited for those mysterious two weeks to return to the site, but it apparently isn’t going to happen. Therefore, we must move forward and submit those haikus again, or new haikus for the first time. This is only going until Sunday. I will then judge them and announce a winner on Monday. All haikus must be about murder. The winner gets two free tix to see Murderers, the ongoing production by the Philadelphia Theatre Company. 2nd place gets two tix to the Adventure Aquarium in Camden. Just post your haikus in the comments section below. You can post a maximum of three haikus total. After that I will no longer judge your haikus Also, please leave an email address so I can contact you if you win. If I can’t contact you, you won’t win. Now get to it!
20 questions
Alright, there is really nothing going on in the news that’s interesting or stupid, so I’m going to do something ridiculously self indulgent, even for me: I’m going to, for the first time ever, fill out one of those Myspace surveys. This one is about booze (I stole it from Smackdown). Here goes:
1. When was the last time you drank?
last night had a beer after work
2. Where did u drink at?
the Bards
3. Have you ever been kicked out of a bar?
yes, I was unjustifiably kicked out of McGillan’s, and I’m still pissed about it
4. Have you ever had an interaction with police while under the influence?
got an underage ticket when I was 20
5. How many drinks does it take you to get drunk?
I dunno, maybe 5 or 6.
What could make baseball better?
Yeah, so the ratings for this years World Series are the worst ever, and baseball has been in a slump since the ’94 strike. What are some ideas to get people interested again? Ern offered that they pla the Series in Las Vegas, which isn’t a bad idea. Always warm, cheap to get to for fans, makes it more of an “event”. I also have an idea I have proposed several times before, and that I am convinced would make regualr season basbeall more exciting: if the teams are tied after 10 innings, you go to home run derby to determine a winner. Hey, hockey realized it had to do something to sexy up the game, so it wento penalty shots. Everybody leaves after the 10th inning of games. If you did home run derby, not a single fan would leave. What idea do you have to improve the game of baseball. No idea is too crazy.