Sarah Palin Has a More Limited Vocab Than Paris Hilton

palinI was reading this piece about Sarah Palin in Vanity Fair, and got to this text of a speech she gave in Missouri about how smart she and her followers are: “They talk down to us. Especially here in the heartland. Oh, man. They think that, if we were just smart enough, we’d be able to understand their policies. And I so want to tell ’em, and I do tell ’em, Oh, we’re plenty smart, oh yeah—we know what’s goin’ on. And we don’t like what’s goin’ on. And we’re not gonna let them tell us to sit down and shut up.”

I couldn’t help but notice that a staggering 62 of the 72 words (86%) in that paragraph were exactly one syllable long. And 3 of the “big words” were goin’, goin’, and gonna. Don’t let anybody tell you and your followers that they are simple, Sarah. After all, you do know a 4 syllable word (especially). I don’t exactly hang out with rocket scientists, but I can’t imagine any of my friends using almost exclusively one syllable words. Hell, I can’t imagine that if I had a discussion with my 3 year old niece, 86% of her words would be one syllable long.

Well, this experiment isn’t exactly scientific, but I thought, “Why don’t I check out the last 72 words Paris Hilton has written on twitter?” Palin can’t possibly have a more limited vocab than Ms. Cocaine Gum herself, right? Wrong. Of the last 72 words Paris has written on twitter (not including @s, links, people’s names, or xoxo), 55 of them were one syllable long (76%). Dunno if this means anything, but it looks like these geniuses who follow Sarah Palin would be a bit overwhelmed if Paris “Big Words” Hilton took the stage.

Quizzo Tonight

LOCUST RENDEZVOUS. 6:15 P.M. Beer specials are $3 Leinenkugel’s and $2 Miller Lites. Lemonade vodka shots are $2. We’ve got a real nice corps of teams at the Vous, but there is certainly room for a few more.

BLACK SHEEP. 8 P.M. The end of summer is usually a bit quieter than normal at all of the bars, so if you’re in town, this is a great time to grab your team some seats. The Black Sheep usually stays pretty packed, though, so I’d get there a little early.

As for last night, we had an upset at O’Neals and the Dysfunktion should have knocked off the Steak, but choked in the final round. Namely, LaPierre choked in the final round. At least, that’s the word on the streets. So it’s a good mix of questions, and scores are a bit higher this week. Meaning, the 2nd place team at the Bards didn’t finish with a 41. Anyhow, hope to see you tonight.

IN OTHER NEWS. Me and Lee’s latest podcast is up on Comcast. We discuss giant Bud Selig statues, the decline of American basketball, and the worst hair in sports. Over on isportacus, we’ve added a few new writers to the mix. And today, I ask if the city of Philly owes Ruben Amaro an apology.

A Mystery Round!

jagger

Did this one a few weeks ago. Let’s see if you can figure out what the theme is to the answers of the following 9 answers. (For more tough questions, click here.)

  1. This musical duo got divorced in 2000 but have continued to rock together since.
  2. Mick Jagger had four kids with this woman, his girlfriend for 22 years.
  3. This Beatles album was released in 1966 and included the songs Eleanor Rigby, the Taxman, and Good Day Sunshine.
  4. The RT French company unveiled this, their most famous product, at the 1904 World’s Fair.
  5. What Bryan Adams song begins, “Driving home this evening, I coulda sworn we had it all worked out.”
  6. 11 year olds learned how to merengue and tango in this 2005 documentary.
  7. What is the name of the stadium the 49ers play their home games in?
  8. Sherlock Holmes first appeared in this alliterative 1887 novel.
  9. Fill in the blank on the Arcade Fire hit: My ________ is a Cage.
  10. What do the answers to numbers 1-9 have in common?

Continue reading “A Mystery Round!” →

Your Quizmaster’s Back, and There’s Gonna Be a Bounty


After a week eating boiled lobster, broiled lobster, lobster stew, lobster rolls, mixing lobster in with Hamburger Helper, and brushing my teeth with lobster flavored toothpaste, I am back. So here’s where we stand. First of all, we rock it at O’Neals at 8 p.m. Biggest regular prize money on the circuit, with $50 going to the winners and $25 for 2nd place.
We then move to Bards at 10:15 p.m. Remember the new “Shaker rule”: you are allowed to have as many people as you want on your team at the Bards only! The Bounty is now $60, which in addition to the $40 gift certificate you can win, means you could walk out of the Bards tonight w/ $100 and the respect of the entire quizzo community. Action starts at 10:15 p.m. Hope to see you there! (As for last week’s photos, btw, Mike Minion says he should have them too me “Soon”. He couldn’t get them to me today because of something about a stolen air conditioner. Also, last night he thought that someone stole his Round Four questions. Apparently there is a conspiracy against Mike. I’m guessing the Soviets are involved. Anyways, the pics should be up soon.0

Quizzopatra on September 10th at Franklin Institute!

cleopatraAfter a couple of years hiatus, we are back on at the Franklin Institute! Yes, we will be quizzing you nerds on all things ancient Egypt, with a few wrinkles to keep everybody honest (I’d expect at least one Bangles question if I was you). It’s gonna  be a fun quiz in the planetarium, with a ceiling show to boot! Action starts at 7 p.m. on September 10th. Please RSVP by calling 215-448-1254. It’s free and in answer to your first question, “Yes, there will be a cash bar.” Hope you can make it. It’s gonna be fun.

RELATED: OMG! You can also RSVP on facebook! It’s a new social media site all the kids are using!

Quizzo Tonight

A great week off, but it’s time to get back in business. I hear things went pretty well last week, except for Koob’s photography skills. I’ll have the rest of the photos up as soon as Mike Minion mails them to me. He’s stuck at some train station somewhere. The details are, as is often the case w/ Quizmaster Minion, a bit fuzzy. But anyways, I’ll have those photos up soon. And keep in mind, he’s back in business tonight (Assuming, of course, he is able to find his way home from a suburban train station at some point.) He will be at the Taproom Terrace in Manayunk at 7:30 p.m. He then makes his move to the Westbury at 10:30 p.m. I’m gonna try to make that one if I’m not too wiped out. (Is there any day more exhausting than the day after vacation?)

OK, So Maybe I’m Not Gonna Be on TV

Of course, mere moments after I posted that thing yesterday, I got a text telling me that the segment was going to be pushed back a week because of the damn Little League World Series. By that time I was on a boat and not near my computer. Freakin’ 12 year olds. They’re like vegetarians. They ruin everything. The segment is being pushed back a week. It’ll be next Saturday, the 4th.

JGT To Be On TV Saturday!

IMG_2054First of all, if you youngsters think I’m going to spend the last two days of vacation posting photos of you, you’re nuts. I am in true man of leisure mode. Photos will be up on Monday. Secondly, I’m going to be on TV on Saturday at 7 p.m. on ABC, as part of the Philadelphia Union pregame show. I hosted a quiz between Alejandro Moreno and Brad Knighton of the Union. I can’t tell you who won, but I can tell you that it was pretty hilarious and had a very controversial finish. Be sure to tune in on Saturday night! Alright, I’m headed over to Portland and then going to take a cruise around the Casco Bay. Talk to ya soon!