Alright, I’ve been having some major computer problems, but i think I can finally post these photos. So I’ll post questions underneath them about people who have disappeared. One guess per person.

Yeah, so, uh, I didn’t get those photos up yet, and now I gotta right my Metro column. I ran late shooting a porno last night. Details forthcoming. But I promise to get the photos up later today.

Been spending all day tooling around with Hopalong Art. Watching V or Vendetta and trying to figure out how to use to use my new videocamera. Working on a film tonight. More details forthcoming. Also, I think the pics are working again, so I’ll be posting the photos of last weeks winners tonight. Holla atcha soon.

Defending City League Champion Johnny Goodtimes shocked the local R Paper Scissors establishment when he announced on friday that he was coming out of retirement to take part in this years RPS Championship. Goodtimes, who earned a spot in the championship due to his shocking upset victory last year, announced his retirement after the competition, and stood by it for an entire year. But his competitive juices were flowing, and he decided to come back this year, “For the children.” Goodtimes, who is extremely unpopular on the RPS circuit, also threw in some shots at his competitors. In the message posted on the PBRRPS website, he told the other competitors, “The surest way of not being humiliated by a great champion like myself isstaying home tomorrow night, and crying your sorry self to sleep, knowing that you will never be a champion, and I will always be a champion.”

JGT will also be emceeing the event, but he will not be rapping.

This week, the speed round was name the most popular websites in the US, according to Alexa. They were, in order: Yahoo, Google, MySpace, MSN, Youtube, EBay, Facebook, craigslist, live.com, wikipedia, Amazon, AOL. Some popular guesses? ESPN (14th), CNN (15th), Mapquest (23rd), Weather (24th), NY Times (26th), and Orbitz (80th). Here is the top 100. (Oh, and in case you are wondering, I don’t know my rank in the US, but worldwide I’m holding steady at 791,814th. That’s right, people. I’m in the top million. Maybe we should have a festival dedicated to that.)

Some random Numbers from JohnnyGoodtimes.com.
2,874 – Number a pageviews in the last month for a post about the pornstar Houston sleeping with 620 men in a day.

3 – Number of visitors from Egypt. One of whom found the site by the search term sex + pizza.

80 – Number of people visiting JohnnyGoodtimes.com looking for Jam Master Sean.

86 – Number of times people asked JohnnyGoodtimes.com if Anton Ohno is gay.

Not much luck on the dating scene lately, so I decided to try craigslist again. Let’s hope this works.

-Wow, did you see Sarah SIlverman rip Paris Hilton last night? Priceless. Jack Nicholson enjoyed it. I think Paris should write a book and call it, “When Bad Things Happen to Bad People.”

-You guys heard of Gary Webb, the journalist who discovered that the CIA was putting crack in the inner cities who was then discredited and his career ruined by the liberal NY Times and Washington Post? Pretty fascinating stuff.

-Happy birthday Bjorn Borg! Just say his name 5 times and see if you’re smiling. You are.

-That TB guy is gonna be on Larry King Live tonight. He’s the biggest media whore since Bono. Geez, if I knew all it took to be famous was to contract deadly tuberculosis, I would have caught it years ago.

Well, Rubefest was almost a reality except for one thing: beer. I had a great space (outside at Jamaican Jerk Hut) but I couldn’t charge people to attend if I had booze (it’s a BYO), and I didn’t have enough time to get kegs donated. But I still think we could have a great event, maybe in July, with music, food, and booze, but we need something Phillycentric and/or absurd to celebrate. Any ideas?

The good news (for him) is that my freaking editor gave Art more space in the paper than she gave me, and he does a good job with it again this week, writing about good Happy Hours. The bad news is that he blew out his Achilles tendon the other night while walking home. He stepped on a hubcap and came down awkwardly. Only in Philadelphia can you hurt yourself by stepping on litter. Anyways, tell Art to get better soon.