Actually, we’ve just received word that there is no basement in the Alamo, so we’re going to have Movie Mondays at the Trocadero instead (1003 Arch Street). I told the good people at the Trocadero that I would agree to do such a thing under one condition: that we start with the greatest film ever produced, Pee Wee Herman’s Big Adventure. They acquiesced, giving me the opportunity to use the word “acquiesce”, which makes me seem like a nerd. I know you are, but what am I? I know you are, but what am I? I know you are, but what am I? Infinity! There will be a lot more details about this new venture forthcoming in the next few days, so be sure to check back, and I hope to see you guys next Monday!
Related: Movie Monday. It’s like a giant cable knit sweater that someone keeps knitting, a-and knitting, a-and knitting, A-AND KNITTING!

With the enormity of the lies we’ve been swallowing for the past six years, Watergate seems like a bad middle school prank, but at the time it was taken very seriously, and Tricky Dick had to step down on August 9, 1974. One of the principles in the Watergate break-in later landed roles on Miami Vice, MacGyver, and AirWolf. Who is it?

I returned to the Poconos last night for the first time in over a year. The last time I went, I was young, in love, and completely carefree. Times have changed. I am now old, alone, and very, very bitter. But I was still able to host quizzo last night for Penn Med Students on a Poconos retreat. It was actually a blast. As you might imagine, the Penn med students were completely out of control, and I had to ask the questions from behind chicken wire. I’m kidding! They were actually really nice, and made being alone and bitter in the Poconos not such a bad thing. The winning team was Gary and the SLPers (above) who defeated Bring It! 104-99.

Larry Platt offered an apology to everyone at the Best of Philly party, b/cthe parking fiasco. We were lucky enough to come from the other direction, so we weren’t stuck in an enormous line, but as I reported earlier, we had to wait over an hour before we found our keys.

In fact, I was humble last week. I actually helped keep the parking situation from becoming a disaster. People were scrambling around on the ground, looking for keys, and things were getting ugly. So I ran inside, grabbed a pen and paper, and started asking people in line what their key number was. I wrote down all the key numbers, went up to the board, and handed it to a girl who worked for the valet service. She found the keys I had written down instead of trying to listen to 100 people shout out their numbers simultaneously, and the line dissipated in just a few minutes. I was a g** d***** hero that night. True story. If Larry Platt decides to write a letter of thanks to yours truly, it will be accepted graciously.

OK, so I got most of the photos up from last week, though I’m still wating on a couple from Jam Master Sean. Got this link from a member of the Jams. It’s Ken Jenning’ blog, and he actually comes off as…a pretty kool guy. Also, I’m finally gonna switch the poll to one about McNabb, but I was a little surprised at the results. After 300 votes were counted, Darth Ern has been proclaimed the most hated man in quizzo, with 36.8% of the vote. MAGMA was 2nd, with 29.5%, and the Sofa Kingdom was 3rd, with 20.7%. I really thought the Kingdom was more hated than MAGMA, but they don’t talk as much smack on the website, so I think that’s why more peope hate MAGMA. But congratulations, though, to the Darthmeister. If not for John Street and Phillies ownership, he’d probably be the most hated man in Philly!

These photos are from the last week in July. No surprises here. The Jams (repped by Barb, above) won at the ‘Vous. The Satan’s Minions won at the Sheep, edging The Axis of Evil Knieval, 102-101.

Finally, Two men from MAGMA (the 2nd most hated man/team in quizzo, after Darth Ern) were able to pull off a victory at the Good Dog, defeating Love Jerome, 87-84.

Yeah, so I got a rash in Reno, then went to a doctor in San Fran who misdiagnosed it as scabies, which is the grossest word ever. It’s sounds like you have rabies and scabs at the same time. Anyways, went to a dermatologist in Narberth who was really good and it turns out I have an allergy. The best part? He put me on steroids, so expect me to be totally buff in time for next week’s quizzo. Ladies: “You mean, even buffer than you are now, Johnny?” Yes, ladies, even buffer.

Due to this rash, I pulled a Brian Wilson on Friday, staying in my room and feeling sorry for myself, but made it out yesterday with Trivia Art and the lovely Ginger on a “Philly Firsts” tour. Went to Tony’s Pizza (still the best in the city), then did the following things for the first time: The Grey Lodge (pretty cool bar), the original Chickie and Pete’s in the Northeast (even lamer than the other ones. I mean, at least the one South Philly has sketchy South Philly girls), then had drinks on the Moshulu Bongo Deck. It was great. A little pricey, but I definitely recommend it on a breezy day. Then had dinner at Dmitri’s for the first time ever. It was really good, but it didn’t blow my mind like I thought it would. A solid meal, but I wouldn’t put it in my top 5 restauratns in the city by any stretch.

I think what I’m getting at here is that I’m gonna get to work on putting at least some of your photos up today. Oh, and my rash is doing much better now. Thanks for asking.

Hey peeps, got a last meeting with Traffic.com people this morning, then have a doctor’s appointment. So I’ll get some pics up later in the day. In the meantime, read the highlights of my cross country trip, all tied up in a tidy little bow.

I rolled into the illaldelph yesterday at about 3:30 p.m., then went to Delassandro’s for my first Philly meal, a cheesesteak. Not as good as Jim’s but still damn good. Then I headed to the Philadelphia Best Of… party last night. It was ok. They had a great band, the Blue Method, and some decent finger food. The scene was a little too sceney for me, but there was a lot of eye candy and I got to meet the Hurricane (Glen, not Ruben). Disaster didn’t strike until the end, when the valet service totally screwed everyting up. My date and I waited over an hour while they tried to find her car keys. There was an enormous line of people waiting, but the valets put the keys in the wrong order, and nobody could find anything. It wouldn’t have been so bad if the weather outside wasn’t 95 degrees, so everybody was covered in sweat. I will have to hand it to the valet service though. Although they totally screwed everything up, they did try to handle it with humor and didn’t let the thing explode, like it could have. Still, pretty inexcusable. I doubt they’re gonna be named Best Of Philly anytime soon. That’s like me forgetting to bring questions to Quizzo Bowl. Anyways, I’m more excited about tonight than I was about last night. Gonna be nice to rock the mic again.

JGT is returning to the east coast on Wednesday after his three week cross country drive. On Wednesday night, he’ll be attending a “Welcome Back” party hosted by Philadelphia Magazine (some people who are “out of the loop” are calling it a “Best of Philly” party), then will be returning to action Thursday night at the Good Dog. Today, I’m just gonna hang in San Fran. Man, the weather here is incredible. Mid 60s every day. I’m sure you suffering souls wanted to hear that.