The Pizza Here Sucks

It?s been hard to find anything to complain about here, but you all know me. I?ll find something. And I?m not even kidding about the pizza. But the Mexican food is great. The staff at the facility is amazing. They do like a 20 minute sea lion show, and my rewrite is pretty damn funny, if I do say so myself.

Now I know what you?re all thinking. You?re thinking that I?m spending my time taking advantage of the free chips and salsa at the local cantinas, getting really drunk every night, and getting shot down by beautiful women. But that?s simply not true. Most of the women that shoot me down aren?t even that attractive. Speaking of ugly, Tuesday night sure was. I went out with some of the guys I work with, and grabbed some tacos. I also learned that beer is supposed to be drunk with salt, so I?ve been doing that lately. Because I?m a local. Now as you all know, drinking tequila makes you smarter. So that?s why I found myself climbing a narrow stairwell to the top of the clock tower in the center of town at about one o?clock in the morning (please don?t tell my mom). A policeman apparently saw me and my buddy climb out the door When he asked what we were doing, my friend answered, ?We went in the door on the side of the clock tower because we thought it was a bathroom.” The cop seemed satisfied with that answer, so I didn?t have to bust out a five spot this time. Interesting fact about the cops in Mexico: They have to buy their own guns, so a lot of them have nines and M-16s.

Most of the Americans here are obnoxious toolbags from places like Texas and Florida who wear flourescent pink tank tops and t-shirts which say things like, “I?m shy, but I have a big ****.” So I spend almost all my time hanging out with the Mexicans and Mayans from work who are all extremely kool. Well, I gotta catch the bus home, but I?ll write again soon.