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The President of Tony Blair’s Irish Fan Club and team member of Track and Field Jesus Liam Snodgrass celebrated his birthday on Tuesday. Anybody else who has a birthday coming up, be sure to contact Johnny, and I’ll put you on the website.
Site of the Day
Here’s the official site of the Darwin Awards, given to people who die in the stupidest ways.
Website of the Day
I’m putting this one back on, in case you missed it last week. It might be the weirdest one ever.
Question of the Week

What was the name of the island in the movie Jaws?
Johnny Blasted By the Critics!
To read the critics blasting Johnny, click here and scroll down to Thursday’s entry. Hit “comments” to read Johnny’s response.
Deadline is Today! (This Week’s Stories Below)
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If you’re interested in being the next Johnny Goodtimes, you must sign up today. Thus far there are four people in the contest. Several people who have told me they’re interested have not yet signed up. Hit contact Johnny on the right and send me an email. You must be free on Tuesday thru Thursday nights for three weeks in August. The contest is open to both females and males, as well as hot, sexy shemales. The pay is pretty damn good. On Friday, you will be given your first assignment. You also need to be free to tryout at a variety of quizzos over the next two weeks. I am not sure how to spell quizzo when it’s pluralized. Quizzos or quizzoes? Judging will be determined online and by the Johnny Goodtimes Parliament (above), a group, formed in the 1740’s, that determines all decisions of this magnitude.
Robots: Friend or Foe
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Everything seemed to go fine at Doc Watson’s on Monday. The winning team, whose name Johnny forgot, worked with a robot to achieve victory. It was a great moment for human-android relations. The robot was perfectly friendly, and I don’t know what Will Smith has his panties all up in a bunch for. I mean, robots are…HOLY S***, THAT ROBOT JUST ATE SOMEBODIES HEAD OFF! MAYBE WE SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO WILL! I MEAN, HE DID WRITE PARENTS JUST DON’T AAAAAAAAAAAA!
Check Out This Mullet!
Kid gets into trouble at school for having a bitchin’ hairstyle. Also, if you didn’t take this test the other day, you have to take it now.
Website of the Day
I’m the real Saddam, yes I’m the real Saddam.
Weirdest Website Ever?
This may be it. Warning: Parts of it are tasteless, and not suitable for work (don’t click on gennies), but most of it is ok, and downright amazing.
