The good news (for him) is that my freaking editor gave Art more space in the paper than she gave me, and he does a good job with it again this week, writing about good Happy Hours. The bad news is that he blew out his Achilles tendon the other night while walking home. He stepped on a hubcap and came down awkwardly. Only in Philadelphia can you hurt yourself by stepping on litter. Anyways, tell Art to get better soon.
What’s the best bar in Philly, Part II
ALright, I posted a column a couple of weeks ago where I asked what the best non JGT quizzo related bar in Philly was. Got a lot of answers, so I had to narrow it down somewhat but still giving you a bunch of choices, and an “other” option if you feel like you need to write one in.
Question of the week
Allen Iverson’s birthday is on Thursday. At what school did he play high school basketball?
Post game adventures
Needless to say, the game went well. The Phillies really put up a spirited fight. But hey, I got a Schmitter and still had a good time. So after the game, me and the crew went to the Cantina, where they have happy hour pitchers of Margaritas for $10. After stumbling out of there, Nate and I were walking at around 12th and Washington when a disheveled, moderately crazy looking guy, wearing three winter coats on an 80 degree day and waiting for the bus with a bag lady, noticed our Phillies shirts. We thought he was gonna ask us for change. “As a Phillies fan for 40 years, can I tell you guys something?” he asked rhetorically and a little wild eyed. “Never go to the businessman special. They always lose the businessman special games. They don’t even try. What was it, 8-1?” We told him yes and he replied, “See, I told you, they don’t even try. You can go to the Sunday day games, but don’t bother with the businessman specials.” The bag lady started screaming madly at him. “They don’t care!! Shut up!!” (You know that optical illusion where one of them is a pretty young lady with a necklace and the other one is an old lady with a bonnet over her head? She looked exactly like that old lady.) He continued. “That was a nice blast by Victorino yesterday wasn’t it? You can go to the Sunday day games, that’s fine. They try to win those.” The bag lady screamed again like a 3 year old. “The bus is here!!!!” “But they always lose the businessman specials. Been losing them for 40 years.” He spun on his heels and hopped on the bus. And that, my friends, is what happens to Phillies fans when they get older. They begin stocking up on winter coats and dating angry bag ladies.
Off to the Ballpark
Where I will drink too much beer, eat too much junk food, and yell vociferously at our moron manager while sitting in the rain. And not wanna be anywhere else. Go Phils!
Around the Horn
-If you are looking to participate in this years City League Rock Paper Scissors Championship, you better play this week. “But Johnny, I haven’t played yet. There’s no way I can earn enough points to move to the Championship.” Oh, but there is. Jam Master Sean has decided to make this week double points week. So win a match or two and you should be eligible to knock off the cities defending champion, whoever that might be (ahem).
-The Phillie foie gras war is heating up. A cover story in the Sunday Inky. Of course, this follows the surreal standoff at Le Bec Fin a couple of weeks ago when some enormous rich guy pulled out his dong and wagged it at a bunch of protesters. I remember the last time I whipped out my unit at Le Bec Fin. It didn’t go over as well as I had hoped.
-It was on this date in 1919 that Congress approved the 19th Amendment, giving women the right to vote. And the country has gone to hell in a handbasket ever since.
-There is a MAJOR quizzo development in the works for mid August. Details in the coming weeks.
Charles Nelson Reilly’s Ascot Collection Wins at Vous
Palestra Jon should know this one: This Mets pitcher blew game Six of the ’86 Series with a terrible 10th inning, but miraculously got the win when the Red Sox had their epic meltdown.
Young Old and Restless win at O’Neals
This pitcher, who lost Game 4 of the 1984 World Series, would give up Pete Rose’s 4,192nd hit less than a year later?
Last weeks winners
Got into a great mid 80’s baseball discussion last night at the Sidecar with Trivia Art and Sidecar owner Adam, where we tried to list the rosters of as many Series teams of the mid 80s as we could. Therefore, this weeks questions will be about obscure mid 80s baseball players who played in the World Series. No lookingthem up, no cheating and one guess per person. (The guy above did not play in a World Series. Do you know who he is?)
Week in Review
Started the week on the good ol’ Eastern Shore of Virginia, where I had a hot date to a wedding on Saturday. (Rumors that she must be completely blind to be my wedding date are untrue and, quite frankly, unfair. She can make out shapes and colors). Oh, and I did drop a sick hip hop medley at the reception, which consisted of verses from “It’s Tricky”, “Ice, Ice, Baby”, “Shimmy Shimmy Ya”, and “Bust a Move”. Needless to say, it went over extremely well. There was video taken, and if I can get a hold of some, it will propel me to the rap superstardom I so richly deserve. And Eve will be my date to the next wedding. They will call us “hip hop royalty” in the papers. It will be awesome.
On to quizzo, where the Young the Old and the Restless fell behind early, but aced a tough final round to come from behind and cruise past defending champs Dork Sided, 102-88.
A minor upset at the Bards Tuesday night, as the Dysfunktion, seemingly the only team that can hang with the Kingdom on Tuesdays, took a 100-94 win and the extra $20 bounty i had placed on the Sofa’s head.
On to the Rendezvous, where we had a thriller. Charles Nelson Reilly’s Ascot Collection held off Trust Us, We Know, 94-92. The Jams made a 4th round surge, scoring 50 to get to 90, but had made their bed in the movie taglines round. Darth Ern’s knowledge of movie taglines doesn’t extend into the “talkies”. Is their a new threat to Jam dominance at the Vous? Time will tell.
The craziness continued at the Black Sheep. A duo calling themselves Parke Overall tacked up a surprisingly easy win over Duane’s Minions, 91-79. I honestly can’t remember the last time two new teams won on the same night. I bet it’s been at least 3 years.
And the wackiness didn’t stop there. The 2 1/2 Armenians, the new team to beat at the Good Dog, fell to the Goodtimejohnnies.com, 107-101. On Thursday night, the Wild Card round (Things that Sting) was unquestionably tougher than the Impossible Round.
At the Bards, two teams aced round four, but the Hurtin’ Bombs missed less questions in Round Three and edged The Looser the Waistband, the Deeper the Quicksand, 107-104. The Sofa Kingdom was MIA.
Neither the Jams nor the Sofa Kingdom won this week. I would love to know the last time neither one of them won one week. I bet it’s over a year. But I’m too lazy to find out. If anyone wants to do the research (Nate, JohnniE?), I’ll buy ya a drink next week.