Went to Joe’s Pizza (16th Street between Walnut and Sansom) on Tuesday with my man D-Mac from Philadelphiawilldo. First off, the ordering process at Joe’s challenges Pat’s steaks in intimidation. Surly looking Italian people give you a hard stare as they wait for you to place your order, letting you know that your diddling is costing them and everyone behind yuo in line valuable time. But Joe’s isn’t known for it friendliness, it’s known for it’s pizza. I got two slices. I started with a bruschetta slice. Big chunks of sliced tomato and mozzarella on top of a regular slice. It went down quickly, and I started on slice number two. It was a variation of the “Hawaiian pizza” theme, with pineapple and pepperoni instead of ham. This, this was the best slice I’ve had so far. The pineapple was juicy, the pepperonis brought a little kick that I don’t think you get from ham. The ambiance of the place has also improved since they rebuilt after the fire last year. Still a sort of generic pizzeria, but the red booths make the place seem much less “cafeteria-ish” than it used to. They also gave me a chance to invent the word cafeteriaish. Here is D-Mac’s take: I’ll give Joe’s 3 pepperonis out of 5. I know lots of people love the place, but I wouldn’t put it in my Top 5. It’s kind of hit or miss, and sometimes overcooked. Nonetheless, the cheese is good, the slices aren’t too greasy or cheesy. (Cheesy meaning “too much cheese that slides off” not “lame” — but the slices aren’t lame, either.) I liked it a little more than D-Mac did. I’m gonna give it the illustrious three and a half pepperoni mark (out of 5). Alright, now I’m off to NYPD pizza. I’ll have a report this afternoon.

First off, I have to admit, I have probably eaten at Lorenzo’s ten times as many times as I have eaten at any other pizza establishment in the city. When I first moved to Philly and was dirt broke, I lived on 6th and South, so I regularly ate a $2 dinner down the block. And on Tuesday nights, after I finish at O’Neals, I grab a quick slice for dinner before I head to the Bards. So obviously Lorenzo’s has to have something going for it. But I’m not sure what it is, besides the cheapness and the swiftness of the purchase, as well as a little nostalgia (It was, after all, where he was accosted by the paparrazzi while out with Jersey Girl). I mean, the pizza itself is good, and on some occasions it is great. But it can be a little inconsistant. Palestra Jon and I went on Monday night. The line was short, and we each grabbed a slice and went to the back, where they have placed giant mirrors so you can watch yourself eat. I don’t like watching myself eat.

Of course, part of the charm of Lorenzo’s is the fact that you cannot have anything on your pizza. Anything. At all. Got it? I’ve heard people say that the employees are rude, but I’ve never found that to be the case. Of course, I’m usually there on a Tuesday night, when things are kind of slow. But the dude is always nice to me. Back to the pizza itself. On Monday it was fine. Not amazing, but perfectly good. Here was Jon’s take: I gave it 3 burps….same standards as pepperonis. My evaluation….consistent above average pizza…good cheese, sauce too sweet. Jumbo slice perfect for heavy drinking. If I am just sitting down and eating a slice, this is decent but not great pizza. I think John hit the nail on the head. Three pepperonis it is.

On March 21, 1980, JR Ewing was shot by an unseen assailant. That assailant turned out to be a character named Kristin Shepherd, who was played by the daughter of what famous singer?

Hey gang, as you know I am in the midst of THE GREAT PIZZA HUNT 2006. But this is not a mission I can accomplish all by myself. I need people to assist me in eating and judging various pizza spots (I’m only asking you to join me for one spot, not for all of them). Believe it or not, this is not a pathetic attempt by me to troll for dates. I am looking for guys, gals, groups, and even Jerseyites to help me find Philly’s best pie. If you are free at lunch any time and wanna grab a slice, drop me a line. And don’t say no just because I look like a total toolbox in the above photo.

Johnny Goodtimes began THE GREAT PIZZA HUNT OF 2006 on Friday, getting a pie at the Pietro’s on 17th and Walnut with well respected pizza enthusiast (and roommate) Trivia Art. Let’s start with ambiance: Pietro’s looks ok inside, but it doesn’t have much of it. Lots of plastic plants and paintings that look like they were bought from Ross Dress For Less. I did, however, like the tall tin ceilings. They had televisions showing tourney games (a plus!), which seemed sort of strange with opera music providing the soundtrack. The crowd was young and attractive, including a hottie at a nearby table who was speaking a foreing language, like French or Spanish or Aramaic or something. But this wasn’t a trip to find hottest foreign honeys, this was THE GREAT PIZZA HUNT OF 2006, so let’s move to flavor: First off, Coke. There is a major Coke problem in this city. Seriously, it seems like a lot of bars and restaurants in this city put aspirin or something in their Cokes, because it tastes chalky and awful. So I was happy to discover that Pietro’s Coke was aspirin-free and tasty. The pie came out, and it looked beautiful. White mozarella cheese, thick chunks of tomato in the sauce, big thick pepperoni’s. And it tasted almost as good as it looked, especially the thick pepperoni’s. I tore through four slices in a hurry. Finally, service. It was ok. Not bad, but certainly not personable. Typical late lunch service. The Johnny Goodtimes Final Grade for Pietro’s on Walnut was the same as Trivia Art’s: 3 pepperonis out of a possible 5. A good solid selection to start THE GREAT PIZZA HUNT OF 2006.

Yo peeps. I wanna find out who has the best pizza in the area. Need a little help. Please post under commetns below who you think has the best pie in or near Philly. I’ll try out a bunch of them, and find out, once and for all, who has the best. Also, the bracket challenge will be up as soon as I can figure out how we did it last year, so check back soon.

There was nothing fishy about the Furry Lap Flounders win at Havana on Monday night, as they took the lead early and held it throughout. Despite their win and the fact that they were really nice, they were not Johnny’s favorite team. You get three guesses to find out which one was.

The Bojangles

Courtney’s 21st Birthday

PMS

Hal from Cal

Roast Beef (aka the Meat Curtain)

Do not open your own casino unless you hire Quincy Jones or Bon Jovi to pimp it first! That’s the message Philly sent yesterday by arresting an illegal casino. Because remember, when it’s sanctioned by the city, it’s fun, but when it’s privately run, it’s evil. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, untaxed revenue, yada yada.)

Parasitic won the first ever quizzo at Johnny’s grand experiment at Havana in New Hope. Things could have gotten ugly, as there were at first only seven people there, but thankfully a table of fifteen walked in and split up into three teams (Parasitic was one), and it ended up being pretty fun. While Johnny is somewhat of a household name to the nerds of Philadelphia, it’s gonna be interesting to see how things work out outside of the old comfort zone. It’s good though, because it is a reminder of how tough it was to get this thing rolling at first (I used to troll around Old City, trying to convince people to play at Nick’s Roast Beef). Yes, this story did just sway from the third person to the first person. You can handle it.

Standing by the Bathroom was able to overcome their nosebleed seats to take the victory at the Bards on THursday night, but were fuming mad after the contest. “What the hell is going on here?” Katie Coffey screamed after the contest. “Where was the bus that was supposed to get Johnny Weir to the freaking arena?” Added a livid Chadworth Cartwright, “How is Johnny supposed to bring his a-game when the freaking bus delivers him to the arena 47 minutes before the contest? Don’t these stupid Italian bus drivers know that Johnny needs 50 minutes just to apply his make-up, and another 30 minutes to apply his sequins? Freaking axis powers.”