It was a cold and dark night outside, but inside the Fels Planetarium at the Franklin Institute the stars were shining bright and the Simpsons fanatics were ready to test their skills. Johnny stayed true to his word, and threw off some people with a round about famous people named Homer, Lisa, Bart, Marge, and Maggie. But his favorite round was definitely his second one. In honor of one of my (yeah, I’m back to the first person) favorite funnymen of all time, Phil Hartman, the 50-50 round was Ed Wood movie or Troy McClure movie. Answers are after the jump.

1. The Erotic Advenutes of Hercules
2. One Million ACDC
3. The Night the Banshee Died
4. Glen or Glenda
5. Plan 9 From Outer SPace
6. Hitler Doesn’t Live Here Anymore
7. The Verdict Was Mail Fraud
8. The Revenge of Abe Lincoln
9. Necromania: A Tale of Weird Love
10. David Versus Super Goliath

Continue reading “Chimpan-A to Chimpan-Z wins Simpsons Quizzo” →

So I’m talking to my mom last night, and she says, “I signed your Pluto thing,” which was sweet, because she was one of like three people who signed it (other than the boob who wrote “Gregory Goodtimes, Norbert Nicetimes, Albert Awesometimes, etc.”). Then she said, “This is so stupid. You know what this is? This is just a ploy to sell more science textbooks.” But of course! It makes perfect sense. If they take Pluto out of the solar system, every single science textbook in America will need to be replaced, at a cost of billions of dollars (total, not each). And how many dollars does Pluto pump into our economy? Zero. So there you have it. Mrs. Goodtimes has exposed the dark underbelly of this Machivallian plot*!

*I have no idea what that means, but it sounds really kool.

Yeah, sorry peeps. I’ve been a slacker today. Somebody sent me an email telling me that I was being passive aggressive about something and then I called a smart friend of mine to find out what it meant and they told me that yeah, I am kind of passive aggressive, so then I was kind of pissed about these lies, but I didn’t want to let on, so I just kind of dropped a few hints about how I felt about being called passive aggressive but didn’t really confront it, because hey, it’s all a bunch of lies anyway, right? And the next thing you know, it’s time to work on my questions for tonight. So there you have it. And as far as my Pluto petition goes, it’s fine. I didn’t want you guys to sign it, anyway. So, it’s kool. You guys didn’t hurt my feelings by ignoring my heartfelt plea for help. So don’t worry about it. Because it’s no big deal.

If you are my age, you remember when it seemed like every hip hop album was an explosion of black intelligence and creativity, from the works of Public Enemy to De La Soul to Rakim. But the music has done a 180, going out of its way to ignore its roots. It seems that most current mainstream hip hop artists (with some notable exceptions, such as Nas and Jay Z) are modern day minstrels, acting out old black stereotypes for the amusement of what have become primarily white consumers. It is pathetic, and a part of me wishes hip hop had died in the late 80s like everybody thought it would. But this Roots album is a breath of fresh air, going against the grain, discussing the reality of inner city violence without glorifying it, intelligently rapping about politics, and reminding us that there are words that rhyme other than “crunk” and “drunk”. The lyrics are awe-inspiring and personal, and the production is fantastic. Having been a hip hop fan for over 20 years, but having been completely turned off in the past few years, I want to thank the Roots for reminding me why I loved this type of music in the first place.

I will be hosting a Simpson’s quizzo at the Franklin Institute on friday night. There is a presentation by John Dilworth, creator of Courage the Cowardly Dog. That is from 8-10 and costs $8. Quizzo starts at 10 in the planetarium and is free. While the questions will be Simpson based, there will be a few wrinkles thrown in to keep Simpsons freaks honest. And yes, they will be serving booze.

In a a startling announcement made earlier today, it was discovered that another human being besides Johnny Goodtimes had signed the “Preserve Pluto’s Planethood” petition! “Wow, this thing is really starting to take off,” saidan exasperated Goodtimes. “With this ‘can-do’ spirit, I think we should have Pluto relisted as a planet in no time.” Critics, who had charged that this was, without question, “the least succesful petition in the history of mankind”, are currently eating their words.

Yeah, we had a bit of a server meltdown today, but it looks like the battlestation has been repaired and we back in business. Yee-haw. To be honest, I’ve just been sitting here all day, trying to deal with my laryngitis! Seriously. I would anticipate a lot of audio and pictures tonight, if I were you.

What astronomer is credited with discovering Pluto in 1930?

As you might imagine, I am simply outraged by Pluto getting the shaft by so-called scientists. Well, I am not going to take this egregious act lying down, or even laying down. Whatever. I started a petition that we hope to send to the evil liars who perpetrated this fraud! I need your help to make Pluto a planet again! Also, check out the new poll on the right side of the page.
SIGN THE PETITION!!!

That’s right, ladies and gentlemen, today is Pee Wee Herman’s birthday. Happy birthday, PW!!!
Related: PW discusses his shady past with none other than Stone Phillips.