My boy Larry Platt is in today’s Inky for defending Philly cheesesteaks. The Philadelphia magaizne editor is one of those nitwits that seems to think that all we do here in Center City is eat cheesesteaks for lunch and Stephen Starr for dinner (there is a story about one or the other in every single freaking issue they ever do.) Anyway’s here’s his thing.:

The Aug. 1 issue of New York Magazine chronicled New York City’s recent cheesesteak boom, partly spurred by the arrival of Tony Luke’s. Them’s fighting words to Philadelphia Magazine editor Larry Platt, who shot off a missive to NY editor Adam Moss.

Platt thinks New Yorkers don’t know Whiz from shinola. “The words New York and cheesesteak together are oxymoronic, not unlike military intelligence. As a native Philadelphian, I’ve grown up with the cheesesteak. The cheesesteak is a friend of mine. Adam, New Yorkers know nothing about cheesesteaks. Consider this letter a declaration of a culinary fatwah: When it comes to gooey artery-cloggers on soft rolls, you need to back off.”

Last Tuesday, Platt dispatched staffers Richard Rys and Andrew Putz, both of whom rated cheesesteaks in Philly Mag articles, to retrace New York Mag’s steps for October’s Philly Mag.

Moss – an old pal of Platt’s, we’ll add – declined comment.

Hey, I’m sending birthday shout outs to two musicians I thoroughly enjoy. The first is John Lee Hooker. If you have not heard him, I highly encourage you to do so. His blues are unlike anybody else’s I’ve heard. Real raw, with little to no rhyme structure. But a great storyteller. Check out “I Cover the Waterfront,” “Tupelo”, and “I’m Bad Like Jesse James.” He was born on this date in 1917. Secondly, GZA of the Wu-Tang Clan turns 39 today. Now, I’m more about the RZA than I am the GZA, but the Genius ain’t bad. Here he discusses his chess game.

There’s gonna be a lot of good stuff happening this week. To kick off, A.D. Amorosi presents First Final Fringefest Gangbang tonight, featuring Fringe festers and comedians working out their acts on stage. There’s no cover, PBRs are only a buck, and SoCO shots (peach bourbon, remember) are dirt cheap. That starts at 9 p.m. at Bar Noir, on 251 South 18th Street. Also, there is quizzo at Dark Horse tonight. Not sure if I’m gonna make it or not (team superstar John is out of town, and I’m scared of being exposed for the fraud I really am).

Hunter S. Thompson’s ashes were fired out of a cannon in Woody Creek. As some of you know, I consider myself a die hard Thompson fan, and have given him various tributes in the past, including an unprecedented two questions of the week (could a third be on the horizon?). Not sure what to say about the cannon blast. Looked kind of…awkward, to be honest, though I appreciate the effort, and I’m sure it was a lot kooler live. Didn’t seem like one of those things that the boob tube can really capture. The media was kept off the ranch so the big stars (Johnny Depp, Bill Murray, George McGovern) wouldn’t be hindered. At first glimpse, that seemed a bit absurd. But I suppose I appreciate it, because the media would have made the story about Johnny Depp and Bill Murray, not about Hunter Thompson. They would have, I’m sure, missed the point, while covering a journalist who rarely did.
Related: great Hunter quotes
Related: Richard Nixon Eulogy

You know who’s birthday it is baby…oooooh, yeah! Here’s an interview in which he bitches about hip-hop, because it “provokes disrespect to women.” Takin’ care of the ladies both inside the bedroom and out…Damn, that is one smooth mutha…I’d be well served to shut my mouth.

Hey, if you or any of your friends are looking for a dog, today’s your lucky day. Pepsi is a one year old female with a face you can’t help but love and a heart of gold. She came in to the shelter very scared and shied away from people, but once she got used to us she would get very excited and try to lick you through the gate! She loves being taken outside to run and play. She also loves to lay on your lap and have her belly rubbed. If you or anyone you know is looking for a dog, please swing by the SPCA and have a look at Pepsi!

Well, I was gonna post this on his actual birthday (August 16th), but I decided to turn it into a question. So today I am celebrating Charles Bukoski’s birthday. Not celebrating the way I should, of course. If I were, I would already be drunk. But I’ll probably read a couple of his poems and drink a Miller High Life or something. The first time I ever heard his poetry was on a camping trip and I was transfixed. The guy who was reading his poems was one of those friends you see every 3 or 4 years and thoroughly enjoy the time you spend hanging out with them and you both say you should do it more often and then you never do. Bukoski’s not for everyone. I have a number of friends who actively hate him, and many critics say he’s untalented and that he’s well known in America simply because we love turning our drunks into heroes. There’s no accounting for taste, I suppose, but I like his stuff. Here’s a really good intro to him in a Rolling Stone article from 1976. And below I have enclosed a couple of poems, though I think you’ve gotta read several and kind of fall into a groove with him.

Continue reading “Happy Birthday Bukowski” →

The idea is that the state doesn’t have rights to limit individuals’ wants and passions. I disagree with that. I think we absolutely have rights because there are consequences to letting people live out whatever wants or passions they desire.
Oh, Ricky. Have you been reading Mao’s Red Book Again?

I have no problem with homosexuality. I have a problem with homosexual acts.
I have no problem with Rick Santorum. I have a problem with the words that come out of his mouth.

“What the Democrats are doing is the equivalent of Adolf Hitler in 1942 saying, ‘I’m in Paris. How dare you invade me. How dare you bomb my city? It’s mine.’ This is no more the rule of the senate than it was the rule of the senate before not to filibuster.”
Yeah, the Democrats are a lot like the Nazis, now that you think about it. Well, except for that whole “destroying Europe and exterminating millions of people because of their religion” thing.

Talikng about priests molesting children.
?Priests, like all of us, are affected by culture. When the culture is sick, every element in it becomes infected. While it is no excuse for this scandal, it is no surprise that Boston, a seat of academic, political and cultural liberalism in America, lies at the center of the storm.?
In fact, I heard that liberals implanted a chip in the priests’ heads that turned them evil!

Isn’t that the ultimate homeland security, standing up and defending marriage?
Hmmmm, who do I see as more of a threat to national security, terrorists or homosexuals…wow, that’s a real toss up. But, you know, Rick’s right. Carson, Kyan, and Jai are a bigger threat to America than Osama bin laden.

“Another corporate good citizen cooperating with parents to keep kids from inappropriate content has been Wal-Mart.”
Thank you Wal-Mart! You may oppose unions, try to get the minimum wage lowered for your store, destroy mom and pop operations, contribute to our trade deficit with China, and sell deadly weapons, but at least I can’t get my hands on the new 50 Cent cd!

“The elementary error of relativism becomes clear when we look at multiculturalism. Sometime in the 1980s, universities began to champion the importance of ‘diversity’ as a central educational value.”
Thank God for Bob Jones University!

This morning in a CNN.com story:

Some 200 people took part in a peace vigil in Cincinnati’s Fountain Square. Many carried candles but were told not to light them because of potential harm to the downtown landmark.

Don’t light your candles because you might set a fountain on fire? But aren’t fountains filled…with…water???

Wanna remind you once again that there will be no quizzo at the Black Sheep tonight. We return there in full force next week.