What Johnny?s been up to

Ok, gang, sorry I haven?t written in a while, but things have been hectic, and I still haven?t had a day off since I got here. The job has been kool. I went from Puerto Aventuras (near Playa del Carmen) to Isla Mujeres, or “Island of the Women”. There are a couple of rumors as to how it got that name. One is that there were various statues of the goddess Ixchel around the island when it was stumbled upon by Spanish explorer Francisco Cordova in 1517. Another is that there were only women in town when Cordaova?s crew landed, since the men were all out fishing. Anyway, it was no “Island of Women” for me. Actually, I was staying in Cancun for the whole week. After my night on the town with H20, I never returned to the hotel district. I mostly hit local spots, had a coupel of cervezas, adn mellowed out. The sun wears me out, and I just couldn?t muster up the energy to get out for a night of dancing. Did make it to a place called Mextreme once, where a friend of mine plays in the house band. I was out with a very cute Mexican girl, and it was pretty fun. I ended up getting on stage and doing “Rappers Delight”, and the crowd went nuts. I can rap my ass off. Sadly, it didn?t really impress Mexican girl as much as it did the rest of the crowd. Other than that, I didn?t do much. I had to speak at a meeting with the company?s executives yesterday, and I went over like a lead balloon. I don?t know if my humor was lost in translation or if (and this can?t be it) I?m just not funny. Anyway, I caught the boat to Cozumel last night, and I will be here for a week. This is the same place I was in April, so I already know a bunch of the staff, including an incredibly cute girl who works in the office. She met me last night when I got off the boat and we went out for dinner at a Cajun restaurant and watched the Olympics. I haven?t really been able to keep up on TV. I didn?t have a tv at the first place i stayed, and my buddy Drew did not have cable. But I?ve been checking ESPN.com enough to know that the Phillies are totally choking. Well, I gotta get to work. Hope all is well in Philly. The tacos are good, but I can?t wait to eat a cheesesteak.

Johnny Moves on to isla mujeres

After a week spent in Puera Aventuras near Playa del Carmen, Johnny moved the operation to Isla Mujeres on Saturday, and I am currently housed at my buddy Drew’s house in Cancun. Drew and I used to work together back in the day at Dolphin Quest in Hawaii, so it’s been fun hanging out. The dolphin programs are insane. When I worked at DQ, the most guests any one trainer would bring into the water with them at one time was five. Here in Mexico, it’s twenty. And these trainers have to operate with two dolphins at a time, as opposed to one for me. In addition, they have eight sessions a day. Oh, and the trainers usually have one day off a week. The workload here is amazing, but these guys hardly ever complain. The staff at both places is unbelievably friendly. As for the dating situation, I actually had another date with the hot twenty year old (Let’s just call her H20). It was pretty great. Went to Senior Frog’s, and then landed at a place called Slices, where I ended up dancing with five mexican girls and partying until 3:30 a.m. with H20. So it was awesome, but I paid dearly when I had to go to a new facility the next morning and make a good first impression with like 40 people. Oh well. Anyways, things are good, but we might be getting a hurricane on Thursday night, which would be intense. Stay tuned.

Johnny has hot date

In the most startling news to hit Philly in quite some time, it was discovered that local quizmaster Johnny G. had a date on Wednesday night with a HOT 20 year old. ?Yeah, we went to Senor Frog?s and the Blue Parrot in Playa del Carmen, and she didn?t even leave me for some young, shirtless meathead, which is what I kind of expect in those types of situations,” said Johnny. Goodtimes went on to add that on the taxi ride home, the taxi driver (whose wife rode in the front seat) played a collection of some of the worst 80’s music ever recorded, including the Karate Kid Love Song and the Top Gun love song.

Johnny?s in Mexico

Hey gang. Arrived in Mexico Friday morning. I?m currently working near Playa del Carmen, whisch is about an hour south of Cancun. The heat here is unbearable, but the chicks are unbelievable. The girls working at this dolphin facility are gorgeous. I?ll send back some pictures as soon as I figure out how to hook my camera up to the computer here. Also, the girl who runs the hotel where I am staying is 29 and single. I found that out when my toilet flooded my room on Saturday night. Oh, and I met a cutie from Canada when I was at the Philly airport. My “game” was a lot better at 6:30 a.m. than I ever would have guessed. I think I need to start picking up women early in the morning instead of late at night. As for the tequila, well I haven?t really hit my drinking stride yet. Booze is a lot more expensive here than it was in Cozumel, and you guys know what a cheap bastard I am. I?m trying to help out at this dolphin facility with customer service. It?s pretty bad here. The best thing to compare it to would be…probably customer service in Philadelphia. My Spanish is improving, slowly but steadily. I?ll try to get pics of the hot girls here up on the sight ASAP.

Sexy Chicks Distract Johnny

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Johnny, distracted by the Sexy Chicks (below) in the back of the room, allowed scores to balloon unnescessarily at Doc Watson’s on Monday, as Oh-ho-ho my Goodness was able to hold off the Altruistic Yiddish, 108-105. Sexy Chicks continue to be an impediment to Johnny’s goal of World Domination, and his behavior on Monday was met with a stiff rebuke from the Johnny Goodtimes Ethics Committee, who are contemplating a rule that would bar sexy women from participating in Quizzo.

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The Deal

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Hey gang, here’s the deal. I’m going to be gone to Mexico for the next three weeks to work at a dolphin facility. I will be keeping a journal of my trip on the website, keeping track of the animals, my alcohol consumption, and my success/failure with the senoritas. The Inquizzanator won the contest and will be taking over. While there will not be photos of the winners on the website, the victories will count in the standings. As of right now, all quizzoes are scheduled to go ahead. If there are any changes in the schedule, I’ll be sure to let you know. Each team may only play in one quizzo per week while I am gone. I plan to be back in action on August 31.