Damn, Smokey! Last Wednesday night, after that devastating loss to the Astros, I jumped up and down and screamed and cursed, and I swore, I swore that I was not going to follow this good for nothing hack loser team anymore. After a victory on Friday night, I went back on my word and attended Saturday night’s game. We blew a 6-4 lead in the seventh inning and lost by one. “That’s it! This time I mean it! I’m done! Finished! Mark my words! Everyone here mark my words! They are as good as gold. I will not follow the Phillies anymore this season!” And yet, there I was, at the Black Sheep last night, jumping up and down when Ramon Martinez hit that grand slam, then asking the question, “Who in the hell is Ramon Martinez?” I guess the point of this story is that you should never take me at my word. Tell me via the poll whether or not you think the Phils are gonna make the playoffs.

I found this while doing research on haiku, as I prepare my masterpiece. Perhaps it will inspire you. Or at least it seems kind of funny. For the full article, click here.

Haiku is more than a form of poetry; it is a way of seeing the world. Each haiku captures a moment of experience; an instant when the ordinary suddenly reveals its inner nature and makes us take a second look at the event, at human nature, at life. It can be as elevated as the ringing of a temple bell, or as simple as sunlight catching a bit of silverware on your table; as isolated as a mountain top, or as crowded as a subway car; revelling in beauty or acknowledging the ugly. What unifies these moments is the way they make us pause and take notice, the way we are still recalling them hours later, the feeling of having had a momentary insight transcending the ordinary, or a glimpse into the very essence of ordinariness itself.

Such an experience, referred to as the “aha moment,” is the central root of a haiku. The act of writing a haiku is an attempt to capture that moment so that others (or we ourselves) can re-experience it and its associated insight. This means picking out of memory the elements of the scene that made it vivid, and expressing them as directly as possible — that is, the goal is to recreate the moment for the reader, not explain it to them (this is sometimes called the “show, don’t tell” rule).

Controversy erupted in the haiku contest as a contestant named Leigh Anne tried to pull off a 4 syllable, 7 syllable, 3 syllable haiku! The Johnny Goodtimes Ethics Committee, which has a history of punishing all haiku related offenses extremely harshly, is looking into the matter.

My favorite group in Philly, possibly in the world, is gonna be performing at the Kimmel Center on Friday night. I just went and got my tickets. These guys are incredible. If you have not seen the Roots yet, I highly encourage you to do so. This is going to be an amazing show.

Alright gang. I’m giving away two tickets to the Adventure Aquarium in Camden to the person that comes up with the best haiku. Obviously, the funnier the better. Haiku poems are generally formed 5 syllables, 7 syllables, 5 syllables. Just post your haiku in the comments section below. I’ll get us started with a bad one:
The wind, a flower,
Butterflies are so pretty
Oatmeal Cream Pies, yum.

Had a friend send me this press release. Please try to do your grocery shopping at Whole Foods at 929 South Street on Wednesday, September 14.

On Wednesday September 14th, Whole Foods South Street will donate 5% of its proceeds to Ready, Willing & Able! Ready, Willing & Able is a residential work training program for formerly homeless men. Our innovative work program offers homeless men the opportunity to break the cycles of homelessness, drug dependency, and incarceration through paid work experience and case management services.

Each ready, willing and able trainee is given a bright blue uniform and is assigned to a Community Improvement Project crew. The “men in blue” provide street cleaning, landscaping and custodial services to neighborhoods in North, West, and South Philadelphia.

First of all, did you guys see the catch the guy on Alabama made on Saturday? You’ve got to see this. Also, here’s an exciting addition of Pop Star or Porn Star. Thanks to Todd for sending me this link.

What famous poem begins with the line, “I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness”?

Well, anyone who’s ever known me, or ever been within earshot of me for more than five minutes, knows that I played basketball against AI in high school. They also know that I shut him down for a half. But there are disbelievers. Fortunately for me, my buddy Phillip played in the same league that summer and saw the game in question, and I recently got an email from him. I wrote him back and asked if he could supply his memories of that fateful summer day in 1992. Yes, some have been slightly exaggerated, but please understand the point: that Johnny Goodtimes shut down AI on the court, and he’s confident that he could do it again.

Continue reading “JGT vs. AI” →

Awesome! In less than two weeks, we were able to raise $492 for the victims of the hurricane. In addition, I was able to find an organization that would double the amount we put in. So, thanks to the quizzo community, we’ve raised $1,500 for the Red Cross! Thanks again, gang, for your donations. In other hurricane news, the local SPCA is housing some pets that were displaced by Hurricane Katrina. They are looking for crates, toys, treats, clean towels or sheets, blankets or old pillows. If you are interested in donating any of these items, please contact Jennifer Richichi at the Pennsylvania SPCA, Jrichichi@pspca.org.