–Milton Street is running for Mayor. Ha, ha, a guy under federal indictment really thinks that he has a chance at being mayor? That would be like a guy getting caught smoking crack with a hooker on video and then still get elected Mayor! Could never happen.
-Carlos Mencia, whose show is about as funny as Brian’s Song, gets his ass handed to him for stealing jokes.
-Quizzo for the Cause postponed till next week due to low turnouts due to weather (At least, uh, I hope it was the weather.)
This week Ginger catches a cold…and catches a Valentine!
It’s been a rough week as I have single handedly kept Kleenex maker Kimberly Clark’s stock up $12 over this time last year. I don’t get sick often. And when I do, i have a hard time “stopping.” It’s kind of like when Mike Seaver on Growing Pains is sick and can’t go to school. He turns on the TV and can’t believe Gilligan’s Island is actually on. He can’t comprehend that the world goes on without him.
I don’t think I am quite that egocentric, but I do think I have to keep functioning as best I can under the circumstances. I worked all weekend and slept when I wasn’t serving up huevos rancheros. I thought “it” would be gone in a day or two but no. I woke up today, still hacking, with the realization that I could have a serious lung infection. I have been making light of the situation for days now, switching up the label on my illness to every other person I talked to. The one that seems to come up the most is tuberculosis. The wanna-be hypochondriac in me did a little research and discovered that over one-third of the world’s population now has the TB bacterium in their bodies and new infections are occurring at a rate of one per second. That’s nothing short of frightening. Most cases are developing in countries that are not.
-The above photo of grass and telephone poles is currently the lead photo on philly.com. I haven’t seen such an engaging photo since that time I took a picture of the inside of my coat pocket. It was an accident, and I felt foolish when I realized what I had done.
–Tim Hardaway just said that he hates gay people. In case you were wondering, Tim’s a really smart guy who has seemlessly made the transition from ballplayer to businessman while keeping his dignity intact. Why, just last week, I saw him play a carpenter named Randy in a game of one on one on the showPros vs. Joes . Tim totally kicked his ass with that killer crossover, then poor Randy couldn’t sack Kordell Stewart. Silly carpenter.
-Michael Jackson might be appearing on American Idol soon. Realitytvmagazine.com reports that “several signs” point to the possibility that Michael Jackson will have his own “Idol” theme-week, and might even “mentor” the impressionable young talent on the show. Remember how well it worked out the last time that MJ “mentored” impressionable young people? This sounds like a really good idea. (from TMZ.com)
–Pat Burrell got engaged over the winter. Fortunately, the first time he met this girl, he didn’t freeze up (there were no runners in scoring position at the time.)
–Still collecting submissions for worst love song of all time.
Hey gang, I just started a column in the Metro that’s gonna be running every Thursday. First on is today, so pick one up!
UPDATE: Here’s the link (thanks Trivia Art)
Well, I promised myself a big trip after Quizzo Bowl and today I delivered. I purchased tickets to Kona, Hawaii for a couple of weeks, and I’m leaving on February 25. Word the f*** up. I haven’t had a vacation since, uh, I was like 15. Honestly. So I am gonna straight max and relax. OK, so that’s not true. I’m sure I’m gonna try to pack as much stuff into two weeks as I humanly can. That’s just how I roll.
I lived in Kona from March 1998-December 2000, and this is my first return. This will be the first time I have seen several very close friends in over 6 years. So for the next couple of weeks I will be reminiscing about my first stay there, which should certainly drive my site hits way down, b/c seriously, who wants to read about that s***? But I’m gonna write about it anyway, so just deal with it. And yes, I plan to blog while I’m there. Or maybe not. We’ll see. I am fired up!
Sorry I’m off to such a late start. But it is the holidays and all, so I went out for a hot chocolate at Darling’s Cheesecakes this morning. Ah yes, hot chocolate at Darling’s in the midst of a winter storm on Valentine’s Day. Boy, nothing more romantic than that! Unless you are a dude and you are grabbing that hot chocolate with Trivia Art. Then it’s not quite as romantic. Aww, screw you, I don’t even want a stupid Valentine! Just leave me alone!
I am very excited to announce the addition of some of my favorite comedians to Saturday night’s show at the Trocadero. Pat House, recently featured in Philadelphia Weekly, has been added to the show. John Kensil, who has been plying his trade in LA for the past year, will be on the show. And one of my personal favorites, Chris Schlotterer will be doing time as well. He is an absolute riot. Of course, I will be hosting and Chip Chantry will be headlining. It’s going to be a fantastic show and tix are only $5.
Last year around this time, I posted what I thought were the worst love songs of all time. Well, this year I want you to tell me what they are. And who knows, maybe the one you suggest could be a question this week. So post below what you think is the worst love song of all time. Oh, and the pic above is of Muskrat Love. (I still can’t decide whether it’s the greatest love song of all time or the worst.)
Hey gang, gonna be a little selfish this week. As many of you know, I am coaching a Little League basketball team, and the end of our inaugural season is rapidly approaching. The head of the league wants to get trophies for all of the players for making this first year of the league a success, and is trying to raise money to do so without having to ask the kids, many of whom come from situations where money for a basketball trophy is out of the question. Therefore, I am gonna ask everyone playing quizzo this week to donate at least a dollar to play so we can get trophies. Thanks for your support!
PS: If you can donate about 6-8 hours a month to completely change a child’s life for the better and help make Philadelphia a world class city, please do so! Remember that the smallest good deed is greater than the greatest grand intention.
In what state will you find the city of Valentine, which calls itself Heart City?
