Ok, first of all, you NEED to read this. Then continue below:
Quizzo tonight begins at the Comcast Center, the tallest and most luxurious building in the city. BYO Bottle Service will make every guest at the quiz feel like a VIP (Vogue Intellectual Passionate). Between rounds, DJs from Miami and Ibiza will be spinning all of the latest club jams. Johnny Goodtimes’s contacts in the dance club scene are going to really pay off here.
On to Alla Spina, where DJ Carl B Sure will be asking questions that are TOOTO (totally out of the ordinary). Carl B is a young quizzo impresario who is looking to transform Philadelphia’s quizzo scene. 8 p.m. until sunrise.
Johnny returns to O’Neals, where you may notice just how crystal clear his voice will be as he asks questions; it’s no wonder, his speakers were made by Finnish soundsmiths. That starts at 8 p.m. and goes until you think you can’t possibly dance to a another Skrillex song; at which point Johnny will put on another Skrillex song and you’ll find a second gear you never knew you had.
AFTERPARTY! You heard me, girls. What’s a party without an afterparty? We’ll be at the City Tap House at 10:15, and we’ll be outdoors. Thanks to Johnny’s high level contacts in the quizzo world, there are going to be some of the most carefully cultivated questions you’ve ever heard in your life. But hey: that’s all part of the TOOTO experience.
Wait, how do we know this is going to work? I can’t explain that due to nondisclosure agreements, but trust you me, tonight’s quiz will have the LATEST and the GREATEST of everything. It’s going to be phenomenal.