Month: September 2012

JGT and the Philadelphia Union


I hosted a quizzo for the Philadelphia Union recently that went on the air Sunday before their match. A few notes before you watch: first of all, both of these guys, Chandler Hoffman (below right) and Antoine Hoppenot (below left), were really cool dudes. We had a lot of fun with the shoot. Secondly, Chandler was correct, Dennis Rodman did marry himself, though it was in 1996, not 1998. Finally, it was pretty awesome that the guy who lost (I won’t reveal who) was not happy about it. He didn’t get mad or anything, but I could tell by his face afterwards that he was displeased. As a guy who has been known to not talk to his wife for an hour after losing to her at putt-putt golf, I certainly appreciate other people who are as competitive as I am.

Quizzo Tonight and Other Quizzo News

We kick it off at the Rendezvous at 6:15 p.m. If you want to play with the big boys, this is where you play. Or if you want to $3 Brooklyn Lagers. They also have $2 Mint Chocolate Chip vodka shots. Now, I’ll be honest with you: I had a S’mores shot a few weeks ago after Erin and MaryKay told me how good they were, and, (Man, I hate to admit this publicly) they were pretty damn good. Dunno how the chocolate chip shot will taste, but after that S’mores shot I ain’t gonna judge. “Don’t judge a vodka made for teen girls til you’ve tried it” is my new motto.

On to the Black Sheep at 8 p.m. Duane’s World and Se NUggets are the two favorites. We’ll see if you can knock them off tonight.

OTHER NOTES: A team got busted with their phones out last night then got mad at me for not accepting the answers they wrote for the ones they DIDN’T cheat on. It was amazing. I won’t call them out, but if they cheat again I will. Here’s the deal: Once you cheat, I won’t let you win. Period. I might not even say anything to your team, I just won’t give you any points in the final round. Boom. You’re done. You wanna cheat at quizzo, go play somewhere else.

A Few Thoughts on the NFL Ref Lockout

The NFL is a $9 billion dollar industry. They are locking out the refs over $3 million. To put that math in perspective, here’s a hypothetical equivalent: Let’s say you make $50,000 a year. And let’s say you hire a local teen (let’s call him Greg) to cut your grass for $14 a week for 17 weeks. And Greg does a solid job. He has a weedeater, he cares about the work he does, and you’re quite pleased with the result. But the next year he says he wants a raise. A raise to $15 a pop instead of $14. You are outraged. How could he? Who does he think he is? And so you tell him that until he returns his price to $14 a cut (or $17 a year extra out of your $50,000), you’ll find someone new.

And so you do. You hire Timmy, the kid down the street who doesn’t really know anything about grasscutting but has played some car video games and likes grass. So you hire Timmy, because hey, screw Greg. And Timmy comes over, and he almost immediately runs the grasscutter into the side of the house. He doesn’t have a weedeater, and he gets tired and takes a lot of breaks. He gets halfway finished and decides he’ll come back tomorrow. And so you come  home from your job, and you see a grasscutter in the side of the house, and a job half done, and weeds sticking up everywhere, and you think to yourself, “Well at least he didn’t burn the house down.”

Your yard is a joke. You had a nice, well-manicured lawn, and now your house looks like a backdrop on Honey Boo-Boo. Your neighbors are embarrassed and mad because you’re driving down home values. People are screaming at you to stop this madness, just pay Greg the extra $17 a year. You can certainly afford it. But you need to teach Greg a lesson. Being called a disgrace and a fraud and joke doesn’t really bother you. You only listen to one thing. And that’s money. And right now you’re thinking about using that $17 you saved to buy yourself a burger and a beer.

You are Roger Goodell. $50,000 is $9 billion. $17 is $3 million. And everyone in the country thinks that you’re a slimey, money-grubbing, soulless, braindead moron. That burger better be delicious.