Chip Chantry One Man Show Tonight!

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Hey gang, I’m gonna be helping out on the Chip Chantry One Man Show at the Khyber tonight, and it promises to be a good one. There will be standup from Dan Goodman, a skit from sketch group Animosity Pierre, musical guest John Sterling, and standup by Dennis Horan, one of the funniest comedians you will ever see live. There are also rumors of a special appearance by fastball pitcher Bob Gutierrez and possibly a new educational filmstrip. This is gonna be good. Be at the Khyber (2nd and Chestnut) at 8 p.m. It’s gonna be a roaring good time.

Scoreboard, Brought to You by Gravedigger

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O’NEALS

  1. Savage Henry 86
  2. Queerer than Snuggies 85
  3. Why’s John’s Rum Gone 84
  4. Cellphone in My Pocket 77
  5. This Is Not a Bus 71

BARDS

  1. Sofa Kingdom 110
  2. Narcotyzing Dysfunktion 93
  3. A-Rod Plays Small Ball 83
  4. Money B**** 83
  5. Slumdogs 80

LOCUST RENDEZVOUS

  1. The Jams 108**
  2. Lamda Lamda Lamda 108
  3. Quiz All Over Your Face 89
  4. 1022 89
  5. My Mom Says I’m Cool 87

BLACK SHEEP

  1. L. Ron Hubbard’s Diabetics 105
  2. Duane’s World 91
  3. Random Encounter 85
  4. No THrill w/o Bill 79
  5. Catdog 77

GOOD DOG

  1. Axis of Evil Knieval 112
  2. Fort Awesome 109
  3. Invincible Ignorance 91
  4. Agnew’s Nabobs 78
  5. The Underachievers 67

BARDS

  1. Hurtin Bombs 107
  2. Eschaton 103
  3. Beef With Broccoli 99
  4. Has Been Kingdom 94
  5. I Facebooked Your Mom 86

**Won in Double Overtime

Quick notes

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Alright, kids, I’ll have the scoreboard up this afternoon. I’m running kind of slow today after staying up way too late last night going to the drag show at Bob and Barbara’s and then making the ill-fated decision of going to Lorenzo’s at 3 a.m. for a slice. Now I’m off to lunch at Mama’s, the best falafel in the world. Anyways, Monday is going to be huge. Huge, huge. Biggest day this city has seen since the Slinky was invented here. I have some pretty big announcements, including the Quizzo Bowl announcement. It looks like we’ve got a deal. Finally! So announcement on Monday, along with some other big things poppin’, including Quizzo on the TV. Keep in mind too that the Chip Chantry One Man Show (Featuring Special Guests) will be on Monday as well. It is on like a proverbial video game simian primate.

Happy Birthday Charles van Doren


Today is a big day for birthday’s. Abe Lincoln and Charles Darwin both share their number 200th today. But another interesting birthday is being celebrated today as well. It is the 83rd birthday of Charles van Doren, the man who infamously cheated in the 1950s game show scandal. Here is his full explanation of the scandal, which he wrote for the New Yorker last year. Here is a writeup on the scandal from PBS.

Quizzo News and Notes (Big Things Poppin’)

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Ok, next week is going to be huge. HUGE, people. First of all there is a tv rumor to be addressed. There will be a tv crew at one of next week’s quizzos. I won’t tell you which one because you glory hounds will all show up trying to take the spotlight away from ME, Johnny Goodtimes. So just come to quizzo next week and you may be on TV. Also, the Jams eeked out a win over Lamda in Double Overtime last night, so the Bounty is bumped up to $25 next week. As mentioned earlier, I have a great comedy show with Chip on Monday. Finally, I am extremely close to having a deal for Quizzo Bowl. I am almost sure I will have it signed by Monday. Stay tuned. I’m pretty sure we’re looking at March 28th, so save the date. Oh yeah, and a new quiz tonight. Good Dog at 8 p.m., and Bards at 10 p.m. See ya tonight.

Crime of Passion: Jimmy Swaggart


Last night I asked what televangelist got busted with a prostitute in 1988, and said, “Lord I have sinned against you.” Well above is a short documentary on the fallout. Here is a pic of the prostitute he got busted with…the first time. I cannot find full video of this sermon anywhere, which is unbelievable. Here is the script of that famous speech. After he took a three month absence from the pulpit, Swaggart returned, saying, “If I don’t return to the pulpit this weekend, millions of people will go to hell.” Jimmy, who interestingly enough is cousins with Jerry Lee Lewis, got in trouble again in 1991 when he was caught with another hooker. Rather than confessing to the congregation this time, however, he told them that “The Lord told me it’s flat none of your business.” Ozzy Osbourne recorded a song about Swaggart called Miracle Man. Swaggart is still preaching the word of God, and God has to be extremely pleased with this development. Jim really seems like a pretty terrific guy. And he plays a pretty mean piano. (Seriously, his music isn’t that bad.)