Junk Mail can be fun!

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So I got one of those “My late husband sent me a ton of money and I need to give some of it to you, complete stranger” emails yesterday, and being it was a rainy Sunday, I decided to respond (that’s the passport she sent me, above). Here was the initial email, with my response after the jump. She actually wrote back to me today! If I do decide to contact her lawyer, I’ll let you know. Oh, and I hope you will follow her advice to “always be prayerful”.

Dear Beloved,

Glory to God in heaven. My name is Mrs. Anne Marie Joubert from South Africa. I am married to Mr. Abraham Benjamin Joubert, who is a mechanical engineer worked with shell petroleum company for many years before he died in 2004. We were married for eleven years without a child. He died after a brief illness that lasted for only four days.

Before his death we were both born again Christians. Since his death I decided not to re-marry or get a child outside my matrimonial home which the Bible is against. When my late husband was alive he deposited a total sum of $10.5 Million ( Ten Million, Five Hundred Thousand U.S.Dollars) with a security and finance company in Europe.

Presently, this money is still under the safe keeping of the reserve company. Recently, my Doctor told me that I would not last for the next seven months due to my cancer problems. Though what disturbs me most is my stroke. Having known my condition, I decided to donate this fund to church or better still a Christian individual that will utilize this money the way I am going to instruct here in. I want a church or God fearing individual that will use this fund on, orphanages and widows propagating the word of God and give help to mankind. The Bible made us to understand that blessed is the hand that givet.

I took this decision because I don’t have any child that will inherit this money and my husband relatives are not Christians and I don’t want my husband’s hard earned money to be misused by unbelievers. I don’t want a situation where this money will be used in an ungodly manner. Hence the reason for taking this bold decision.

I am not afraid of death hence I know where I am going. I know that I am going to be in the bosom of the Lord. Exodus 14 VS 14 says that the lord will fight my case and I shall hold my peace. I don’t need any telephone communication in this regard because of my health condition and the presence of my husband’s relatives around me always. I don’t want them to know about this development.

With God all things are possible. My happiness is that I lived a life of a worthy Christian. Whoever that wants to serve the Lord must serve him in spirit and truth. Please always be prayerful all through your any delay in your reply will give me room in sourcing for a church or Christian individual for this same purpose. Please assure me that you will act accordingly as I stated herein. Hoping to hear from you as soon as possible.

Remain blessed in the name of the Lord.
Yours in Christ, Read Hebrews13:15v16 New Living Translation
Mrs. Anne Marie Joubert.

After the break, Johnny responds.

Dear Anne Marie,

Praise Jesus, Hosannah in the highest. I am sorry to hear about your husbands death and can totally understand why you want to keep the money away from your husbands family. As a disciple of Christ, I hate to talk poorly of others, but your husband’s family’s heathen ways are certainly a cause for concern.

Wow, cancer PLUS a stroke? That sounds rough. I am amazed that you were able to find the strength to write me that email. What a brave and strong woman you are! I am sure you get that strength from your Lord and Savior, Jesus. With him, all things are possible, even if you have cancer and a stroke. But I can understand why you don’t want phone calls. Jabbin all day will sap the strength right out of you, especially with cancer and a stroke.

Anyways, I work with orphans. Blind orphans. And boy could we use the money! It’s funny that I heard from you today. Last night, before I went to bed, I clasped my hands together and I said, “Lord, please send us some money. Please send some money to our poor little orphanage.” And damn if you didn’t send me that email within 24 hours! This is what I like to call, “One of the Lord’s many miracles.” It’s like when Jesus turned the water into wine coolers. Except you and I, we’re gonna turn these filthy blind orphans into clean blind orphans! It will also give us the money to pay our lawyers after last years “incident” at the orphanage (Not my fault!).

Now, what do you need from me? Social Security number? Credit card number? What? You name it, you got it! I know I can trust you; I can feel the strength of the baby Jesus in your words. And don’t give up on that cancer and stroke. I’ll be praying to Jesus every night for you to get better. Last night, I prayed for a kind heart like yours, and it came true. So I’m sure the Lord is gonna reward me if I pray for your cancer and stroke to go away! (But if you do die from your cancer and stroke, I hope we get the money.)

Let’s get this thing going!

Yours in Christ,