Around the Horn

Sylvester Stallone gets busted for 48 vials of HGH. I can’t understand why people are upset about this. I mean, ROCKY DOESN’T REALLY EXIST. He’s a movie character. Who cares if he’s using HGH? It’s not cheating. I don’t think Clubber Lang is like, “Bulls***! I would have killed that guy if he wasn’t cheating!”

Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott just had a baby. The baby is expected to look like Nancy Grace and be remarkably devoid of talent.

Al Gore takes some heat in the scientific community for his global warming film. I still can’t understand the backlash against it. I mean, what if we take precautionary measures, and, uh, pollute the air a lot less? Who’s really against that?

-The Israeli ambassador to El Salvador has been removed: El Salvador police found Raphael in the yard of his residence, tied up, gagged with a ball and drunk, Israeli media reported. El Salvador sounds fun.