Understanding the Raelians

Now we at johnnygoodtimes.com are always trying to promote unity among people, and try to let people know that our individual beliefs are part of what make us special. No group of people should be discriminated against because of what they believe. Nobody! Except the Raelians. They are a bunch of f****** nutjobs. It was on this day, 32 years ago that a guy named Claude claimed that he met a 25,000 year old alien in the crater of a volcano. What Claude was doing at the volcano is anyone’s guess. This 25,000 year old alien wants to comeback to earth, but only if he’s invited (you know how sensitive aliens get when they are that old.) So the Raelians want to build an embassy to welcome the alien to earth

The Raelians are big fans of cloning, which they think will enable them to live forever, by storing people’s memories in computer chips and then transferring them from one clone to the next as time goes on.

There are rumors that the Raelians use sex as a recruitment tool, though sadly, I have never been recruited, so I can’t confirm nor deny those reports. This article talks more about these wild recruitment parties.

More importantly, there are some hot chicks on the testimonial section of the official website. And they’re insane. Also, click on “USA” below the pics to read some kick ass testimonials, such as “Infinity becomes aware of itself through the consciousness of the human being” and “Spread our wings to the harmony of Infinity… to celebrate our dreams!” My wings are spread, and I’m ready to celebrate!