Month: February 2005

nicotine hunger force wins, loves camilla

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The Nicotine Hunger Force wasn’t happy with just a win at Doc Watson’s on Monday, they also wanted to make a fashion statement. “We’ve both been huge Camilla fans for years. Wearing these Camilla hats was our way of not only showing her how much we loved her, but also showing America how Kool she is-with a capital K!”
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Ern’s Fearless Oscar Predictions

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Oscar afficianardo Ernest P. Kern has made his fearless predictions for the Oscars on Sunday. Here goes.

Best Picture– “The Aviator” 33 of the last 37 movies to lead
in nominations won Best Picture. The 4 that didn’t was either the first
part of a trilogy (Lord of the Rings – The Fellowship of the Ring) or
starred Warren Beatty (Bonnie and Clyde, Reds, Bugsy) The Aviator is
neither part of a trilogy or has Warren Beatty .

Best Actor – Jamie Foxx – “Ray” If there is such a thing as a LOCK this is it.

Best Actress – Hilary Swank – “Million Dollar Baby” I would estimate more
members saw this performance than the other 4 combined.

Best Supporting Actor – I’m going out on a limb here. Clive Owen won a
Golden Globe. Morgan Freeman won the SAG award. I’m predicting Thomas Haden Church for “Sideways” The Academy will want to give “Sideways” more than just an Adapted Screenplay Award.

Best Supporting Actress – Cate Blanchett – “The Aviator” The Academy loves it when a Lead takes a Supporting role (ex. Renee Zellweger last year)

Best Director – Martin Scorsese – “The Aviator” The Academy is tired of hearing “THE WORLD’S GREATEST LIVING DIRECTOR who’s never won an academy award” If he doesn’t win there will be a BIG push to get him a Lifetime Achievement Award. (Like what they did with Hitchcock)

Good Hunter S. Thompson quotes and articles

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Hey, I’ve started compiling some good Hunter quotes, and as I am reading one of his books of letters right now, I am sure I’ll have more coming. If you’ve got any good ones, feel free to add them. Also, here’s a funny article by Tom Wolfe about the times he spent with Hunter. And here’s a short but wonderful eulogy by his famous artist friend Ralph Steadman. Finally, check out my eulogy to the good doctor on the message board. Click below to see the quotes.

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Tearful Johnny Apologizes

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A pathetic Johnny Goodtimes returned to Capitol Hill this morning (wait, Capitol Hill, Capitol Grill, I just got the play on words! Just now! Seriously. I’m a moron.) to apologize to the outraged patrons of O’Neals who played quizzo last night. “Maroon 5 totally blows, I know they totally blow, and still I played one of their songs last night. It was indefensible. Yeah, I’ve played Richard Marx and Bryan Adams in the past, but at least they are amusing. Maroon 5 just f****** sucks, and there was no excuse for me to play that bulls***. This is one of the most humiliating days of my life.” A tearful Goodtimes was too choked up to finish his speech, and had to be escorted away by Tom Daschle.

Wait a Second, Barry

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What has two thumbs and hates Barry Bonds? This guy. I’ve been a basball fan for a long time, and one of my most cherished memories of the sport is Barry Bonds flubbing a ground ball during the Giants collapse in the 2002 World Series. Needless to say, his interview yesterday certainly didn’t gain him any more fans. But he did make an interesting point about Babe Ruth being white and him being black. Especially since there are many people who think that Babe Ruth isn’t white.

Orangutan Man goes to the South Pole

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As you may recall, I interviewed Todd Carmichael (and his future fiancee Lauren Hart) in late November about his upcoming trek to the South Pole. Well, in December he joined a very small fraternity of folks who have succesfully made that hike, as he walked over 70 miles through the frozen tundra of Antarctica in an effort to hip people to the plight of the orangutan. Uh, yeah. Orangutans are highly endangered, and will be extinct in just a few years unless something drastic is done. So, in an effort to raise awareness, this coffee entreprenuer attempted the most insane stunt he could think of. In this follow up interview, you’ll learn about the isolation of the trip, the hikers who didn’t make it, and the hardcore scientific gurus who hang out at the South Pole.

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