Have a safe and happy Thanksgiving, everybody!

At a press conference on the steps of Capitol Hill, Johnny Goodtimes tearfully apologized for an error he made in last week’s Quizzo Spectacular. On the question, “True/False: Andrew Jackson was the first president born in the United States of America,” Johnny stated that the answer was true. His reasoning was that the first six presidents were born in the British colonies. However, after receiving an e-mail from angry fan Brett “The Barber” Beefcake, Johnny did more research. “Today, I regret to inform you, the fans, that an inexcusable error was made during last weeks Quizzo. Andrew Jackson was born in 1767, and Martin Van Buren was the first born after July 4, 1776. Though it did not alter last week’s standings, it is an embarrassment to me, my family, and my good friend Paris Hilton. I hope you, the fans, can forgive me,” Johnny said before breaking into uncontrollable sobbing. This has not been an easy week for Goodtimes. He was spotted twice over the weekend at Pat’s Steaks after 3 a.m. ,having obviously struck out with the ladies repeatedly over the course of both nights. Though the press conference was not seen on television here in America, it was seen on two different stations in Saskatchewan, where Johnny is very big.

Frank Clements was sold recently, and when the staff showed up for work on November 1st, they were told they no longer had jobs. There were a lot of wonderful people who worked there, and I will sorely miss them. It was really neat to be a part of Philadelphia history, and I’m sorry that all of that was gone overnight. There aren’t many places like that left.
I thoroughly enjoyed the regular crowd we had on Tuesday nights, and though I know we can never recreate that experience entirely, I do hope we can find somewhere else to meet. If you have anything to say about the Frank Clements closing or would like to let me know where we should try to do a quizzo on Tuesdays at 6:00 p.m., please check out the message board. I have spoken with several bars in the area, and I would like to find one where you guys would feel most comfortable. Edie, everyone’s favorite waitress, wrote a note that I thought you guys might like to read.