Well, I hope you’re ready for the most exciting event in sports, the BCS post season tourney! Almost time for the worst climax to a sporting season in the United States, where a bunch of teams will play in meaningless bowls and two fairly random teams will be selected to play for the national title. Hoo-raa.

Alright, I’m heading out to work on the winter wardrobe. Try to get scores up later today. In the meantime, if you haven’t already, check out my new rap, read the interview I did with Jeopardy winner Celeste DiNucci, or read the column in which I blast Philly Mag.

We’re gonna try out a brand new place for the City vs. City Smackdown, and I think it’s gonna be pretty awesome. The Smackdown, in which we will be competing against teams from Denver and Seattle, will take place on Monday December 10th at the Urban Saloon (2120 Fairmount). They are having their Grand Opening tonight, and there isn’t much to read about them online, but the place looks incredible, the food is reportedly really good (and cheap!), and they’re gonna hook up $5 pitchers of Miller Lite and PBR on the night of the contest, and all other beers will be just $3.50. Word is they have 12 taps and an impressive bottle list. This is gonna be fun. I’ll have more details (price, prizes, etc.) at the start of next week.

Enrico over at the 700 Level made the point that if McNabb plays on Sunday, he will be booed loudly before he even takes a snap. Which will be another opportunity for Eagle fans to make asses of themselves. So I commented, and my argument was quickly rebutted by one of the rocket scientists who hates McNabb. First my comment:
Just goes to show what a bunch of mindless morons Eagles fans are, and why it’s so much more fun to root for the baseball team in this town than the football team. When Iguchi filled in admirably for Utley, we didn’t boo Utley when he returned and pine for the days of Iguchi. Why? Because Phillie aren’t morons. Eagles fans are. I’m not even convinced that McNabb is the right call to start on Sunday, but to boo the best quarterback in a teams 75 year history before he’s taken a single snap? Beyond stupid.

Here’s the 2nd paragraph of Not a fan of five (his first paragraph didn’t make much sense): i’ll be at the game on Sunday, and boo whenever the f@#%@ i feel like it. assholes 😛 beer is the only thing that tells me what to do.

There is no argument I can make that can overcome that logic. He’s right. McNabb does deserve to get booed before he takes a snap. I didn’t see that before, but that’s because I wasn’t letting the beer tell me what to do.

Here’s what you need to know from the release: Just a friendly reminder that we will be celebrating our 4th Anniversary this Sunday 12/2/07 from 4pm until 2am. The Chef will be preparing tasty complimentary appetizers and we will have drink specials and giveaways all night long. The winners of the annual Good Dog photo contest will be announced at 7pm. As always it is a fundraiser for Morris Animal Shelter, so 100% of all raffle proceeds (which Good Dog will match) and 20% of total sales will go towards helping Morris keep up the great work. In honor of our 4th birthday Flying Fish Head Brewer Casey Hughes has created our very own signature brew…
We will be tapping Flying Fish Good Fish Anniversary Ale at 4pm…it is a Double Hopped IPA and it is delicious!

I think I just really hurt my left arm while sneezing.

-First off, lined up a venue today for the City vs. City Smackdown on December 10th and I think it’s gonna be pretty awesome. Announcement coming tomorrow.

-Quizzo tonight at the Good Dog at 8 p.m. Still no overwhelming favorites at the Good Dog (15th and Locust), so if you’re team is decent but not unstoppable and you wanna try to get a win, I suggest you play here.

-At the Bards (20th and Walnut) at 10:15 p.m. The Bards does get the NFL Network on their high def TVs, so if you play quizzo, you won’t miss the Packers vs. Cowboys game.

After his provocative, in depth look at Ron Paul, I had no choice but to make Chip Chantry my official political correspondent. Chip is not only a terrific comedian (he will be performing December 5-8 at Helium) he also has a lot of experience in politics, having once run for Class Treasurer in the 6th Grade. (He lost in a landslide.) Anyways, he will be doing interviews with several of the candidates for President. He begins with Mike Huckabee.

“And let me tell you something about that WOP Giuliani,” MIke Huckabee whispered with a defiant grin, “If he thought he had a bad September ’01, wait till he sees what The Huck has in store for him in December ’07.”

That’s what immediately endeared me to Mike Huckabee: his spunk. This governor of Alabama has shed many pounds over the years, but he has not lost an ounce of grit.

During a campaign stop in Duluth, MN last week, I had the privilege of spending the afternoon with an individual posturing to become the most powerful man in the world; an unlikely profession for such an unassuming, yet captivating southern gentleman. As we briskly walked hand-in-hand along the banks of Lake Superior, Mike Huckabee invited me into his America: an America of truth, justice, and unorthodox surgical procedures.

CHIP CHANTRY– First of all, why Lake Superior?

MIKE HUCKABEE– I like things big, young man. BOLD. Do you think any self respecting candidate would be caught dead along Lake Huron, that piece of crap pond? Do you know who likes Lake Huron, Chip? Gays and Asians.

CC– Point taken. Let’s get down to brass tacks. What’s the first thing Mike Huckabee would change about America if he got elected?

MH– We need to trim the fat from this government. I lost 100 pounds. I know about cutting out the excess.

CC– For example?

MH– I’m a big supporter of Home Schooling- less students we have to educate. And, I mean, those kids are nerds anyway. But let’s not stop with Home Schooling. What about Home Healthcare? Home Gun Control? Home Social Security? If we put the onus on each household, less bureaucrats! I lost 100 pounds.

CC– Congratulations. You look great.

MH– And here is something you may not know about the Mike Huckabee. I was the first man in North America to undergo a hysterectomy, or as I like to call it, a Hucksterectomy. (He shows me his scar, then his eyes light up.) Eat your vitamins and say your prayers, because Huckamania is running wild!

CC– Was a hysterectomy actually neccessary?

MH– My body is like the federal government; you don’t truly know if there is a problem until you get in there and root around a while. And let me tell you one thing you won’t find in my abdomen- 100 extra pounds. I ran a marathon. (He attempts to high five me.)

Continue reading “Chip Chantry Interviews Mike Huckabee” →

Here’s my latest, on what local celebrity smackdowns you’d most like to see. The Metropolis asks, “What philebrity rasslin’ matches would you like to see?”