Scoreboard, Brought to You By Ern Mania!

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O’NEALS

  1. Jonesin’ For Sam 105
  2. This Is Not a Bus 103
  3. Young Old and Restless 97
  4. We Got Nothin’ 92
  5. Suck IT Super Tuesday 85

BARDS (Tuesday)

  1. Sofa Kingdom 115
  2. Just the Tip 91
  3. Narkotyzing 88
  4. Hillary’s Downstairs 73
  5. Girls Gone Oscar Wilde 59

LOCUST RENDEZVOUS

  1. But My Mom Says I’m Cool 85
  2. The Jams 81
  3. 1022 76
  4. Susan’s Peters 76
  5. Tom & Kathleen 72

BLACK SHEEP

  1. The Axis of Evil Knieval 97
  2. Duane’s World 88
  3. CatDog 86
  4. Surrender Hillary 76
  5. Queef Latina 75

GOOD DOG

  1. Oakwood Revisited 89
  2. I Did Blow With Barack 88
  3. Tallstones 81
  4. Ku-nu 80
  5. We’Re Not Bank Tellers 79

BARDS (Thursday)

  1. Hurtin’ Bombs 102
  2. Sofa Kingdom 101
  3. Anal Bum Covers 98
  4. Don’t Sit in Front 94
  5. Western Omelette 92

Around the Horn, brought to you by Andre Igoudala (Video NSFW due to Cussing)

  • Check out my latest post on Kerri Lee’s blog. This one’s about strange festivals in May.
  • Quick note to Chet Bumstead: If I am flirting with a couple of cute girls after quizzo at the Bards, please don’t don’t grab my ass and scream “Come on honey, I’m ovulating.” It really hurts my already very, very weak game.
  • First the questionable goal, then the questionable penalty call. Did the Flyers get hosed last night?
  • Let’s Go Sixers! I’m actually gonna be at the game tonight (My first ever NBA playoff game). Look for me on tv. I’ll be the guy whose seat is about 200 yards from the court. Still, it should be a blast.

Darth Ern Retirement Party Tonight

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Well gang, Darth Ern is retiring from his job to spend more time at the Death Star. I am sure that everyone here wants to send Darth retirement wishes below, so feel free to do so. And if you want to see the Prince of Darkness in person, his retirement party is tonight at the Locust Rendezvous, starting at 5 p.m. Best wishes Darth!

Happy B-Day Ginger!

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Johnny’s good friend and occasional co-host (as well as Philly’s official Queen of Beer) the Lovely Ginger turns 30 today. That’s right 30. Girl, you’ll be a woman soon! Anyways, if you wanna wish Ginger (aka Suzanne Woods) a Happy Birthday, hit her up at Myspace. And if you wanna wish her a happy b-day in person, she’ll be holding court at Jose Pistollas between 6-8 p.m.

JGT Joins Forces With…Kerri-Lee Halkett???

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The world is a strange place, people. I’m going to be a contributing blogger at Kerri-Lee’s blog over the next few weeks, and I posted my first bit today. I met Kerri Lee yesterday and all she talked about was how much she loves D-Mac. Does that mean I can convince Kerri-Lee to join me, D-Mac, and the gang for a little American Gladiator viewing starting next month? Of course not. She has better sense than that. But due to a momentary lapse of reason she has allowed me to blog on her site, and it should be fun.

Ben Franklin: Serial Killer

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Here’s my latest in the Metro about Ben Franklin being a serial killer. I think that a lot of people will just think I’ve lost it, but this is actually a true story. Here’s a newspaper article about it when it first occurred. Also, the woman from the Ben Franklin House in london who was nice enough to get back to me also said this: There is still ongoing research being done at the Department of Archeology at University College London on the bones to determine exactly where the surgical school was (the bones were found in what was the garden) and what surgical techniques were used.

JGT Needs a Logo Contest

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Alright gang, I’ve been doing this long enough without a logo and it’s time to get one. But since I am lazy and not very artistic (with the exception of my rapping) I want you to come up with a logo for Johnny Goodtimes Quizzo. Whoever creates the best logo will get $100 worth of gift certificates to various local restaurants. ($25 each to L2, Cebu, House of Kabob, and Sansom Street Oyster house). Of course, you will also get the glory of a photo on the website. So get crackin’ on photoshop and get me a logo. I’ll give ya a week to come up with one. Send your logos to johnnygoodtimes@hotmail.com.

Charity Sponsors Needed

One of the basketball leagues I coach in is having their banquet on May 3rd, and I need to get some sponsors for the event program they will be handing out to the people at the banquet. The prices are ridiculously cheap ($30 for a full page ad, $20 for half page ad) and you will be helping out a good cause. (It helps pay for the league, which has provided an extremely positive environment for hundreds of children.) If you wanna donate to the program, please hit me up asap. Thanks!

Screw Wawa

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Wawa is leaving the city. The Wawa at the corner of 20th and Chestnut is going to be closing at the end of the month, and I have it on good authority that the others will close when their leases expire. Which means that a) they are turning their backs on some of their most loyal customers and that b) the spokewoman I spoke with a couple of months ago when I did a story on the Rittenhouse Wawa was less than truthful with me and in, turn, Philadelphians when she said that they weren’t leaving the city.

“This is not the beginning of a pullout of Center City Wawa’s,” said Bruce, who disputes rumors that the company is focusing on building Super Wawas, which are larger and include gas pumps. -Philadelphia Metro 2/27/2008

Really? Six of ten pulling out of Center City since 2000 and no new ones being built is not a “pullout”? (I guess technically she is correct, since the pullout began in 2000.) I will never eat at a Wawa in the burbs or get gas from one, and I highly encourage you to do the same. Screw Wawa. We in Center City have loyally supported them for years, and they return the favor by dumping us and lying to us while doing so. P.S. I say this not because I hate Wawa but because I have come to really love it and depend on it and I am sad and frustrated to see it go, especially this way.

Great Time to Be a Philly Sports Fan

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Well gang, this is one of those times that you need to appreciate the moment. The Flyers pulled it off in highly dramatic fashion last night (how the Caps didn’t score as they continually assaulted the net in the 3rd period is anyone’s guess), then the Phillies followed suit by pulling off a thrilling win thanks to Pat the Bat. He is playing like a man in a contract year possessed. And not to mention that the Sixers pulled off a huge upset in Game One and look to keep it going against the Pistons tonight. Good times, people. Enjoy them.