Man, I’m telling you guys, you gotta make it out to Movie Monday. This past Monday, the movie was Office Space (thus the flair on bartender Marianne, above). We also had our most explosive Wheel of Terrific yet, as one lucky player got to smash a printer with a baseball bat while the song “Die Mother****** Die” played in the background. You just can’t put a price tag on that type of entertainment. Actually, we got bumped for Preston and Steve this Monday (Roadhouse), but we’ll be back on the 25th with the Big Lebowski.

One of the funniest films of the last ten years will be airing tonight at the Trocadero (1003 Arch Street). Office Space is one of the few films that has lived up to the hype the last few years, and tonight is gonna be a blast! Ginger, Chip Chantry, and I will hosting the Wheel of Terrific at 7:30 p.m. Whoever wears the most flair gets a free beer.

There are a lot of people asking me, “Johnny, what exactly is the Wheel of Terrific?” The only answer is, “You have to see it for yourself.” There is no way to explain it, other than that it is excellent. The crowd on Monday was a little apprehensive about the wheel at first, and for a second I though we were gonna lose them. But there is one thing that happens once in every Wheel of Terrific, something so horrifying, so unexpected, that it won the crowd over, and we ended up having a great show. Of course, there will be no Movie Monday this week (Labor Day), but we will be back in action on the 11th with Office Space-and the wheel.

Puh-leeeeeeze.

I want you guys to list below what movies you would like to see on Movie Mondays at the Trocadero. Write down up to three movies. Now, I don’t want your three favorite movies necessarily. Yeah, I love Braveheart, but it’s a little too long for the big screen. I want the three movies that you think would be the most fun to watch at the theatre with a group of people. And feel free to back up what someone else posts, so I know which ones are the most popular. Any movie, any genre, any era is fine.

Chip Chantry and I will be hosting the thrilling new game show that is taking America by storm, the Wheel of Terrific. Seriously, you owe it to yourself to see and possibly even partcipate in this game. Then, the movie playing is the horror film Silent Hill. Kickoff is at 7:30 p.m. at the Trocadero (1008 Arch Street).

Last night at the Troc was freaking incredible, as Chip Chantry and I hosted an amazing new game show, Wheel of Terrific, which featured kidnappings, John Mark Karr sightings, and balloons. I am going to highly suggest that you show up next week to see what is, honestly, the greatest game show ever assembled.

Hey gang, it’s the final weekend to see the Two Gentlemen of Verona at the Philaelphia Shakespeare Festival. Tix are free, and it’s going on tonight and Saturday at 7 p.m., and Sunday at 2 p.m. Matt of the Satan’s Minions is acting in this production! For more info, check this out.

Johnny has not met any new hookers in the last 24 hours. We’ll keep you updated.

I’ve seen Pee Wees Big Adventure like 50 times, and I’ve never had as much fun watching it as I did last night at the Trocadero. We had some fun pregame with Pee Wee trivia, then an overflow crowd packed the balcony to watch the greatest film ever made. At halftime, I gave away more free stuff, and Matt won two tickets to see Clap Your Hands Say Yeah by doing the best Pee Wee impersonation, knocking off three other competitors. The entire crowd singing “The stars at night…” nearly brought me to tears, I was so moved.

Me and some peeps then headed to Bar Noir where, I kid you not, I got into a conversation with a hooker. I mean, I should have known when this drop dead gorgeous black girl started flirting with a guy who looks like Pee Wee Herman, but she didn’t beat around the bush or ask me to pay her tab or pull any other Detroit moves. She told me what she did, we chatted for a while, and that was that. She was really nice. I then kicked it with my peeps until the wee hours and watched some bad stand up comedy (though my man, local comedian Chip Chantry, killed it). Finally, I returned home and played some Tecmo Bowl, which I have downloaded onto my computer. It’s incredible. For more pics from last night, click below.
NEXT WEEK: High Fidelity, the only romantic comedy ever that doesn’t suck.

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