• Even if one takes every reefer madness allegation of the prohibitionists at face value, marijuana prohibition has done far more harm to far more people than marijuana ever could.
• Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.
• The central question that emerges…is whether the White community in the South is entitled to take such measures as are necessary to prevail, politically and culturally, in areas where it does not predominate numerically? The sobering answer is Yes—the White community is so entitled because, for the time being, it is the advanced race.
• Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.
• I’d rather entrust the government of the United States to the first 400 people listed in the Boston telephone directory than to the faculty of Harvard University.
• (Of George W. Bush): If you had a European prime minister who experienced what we’ve experienced, it would be expected that he would retire or resign.
• A Conservative is a fellow who is standing athwart history yelling “Stop!”
• I won’t insult your intelligence by suggesting that you really believe what you just said.

Here they come again.The Nader haters, crying about how Nader is going to screw things up again. I don’t think Nader will get a lot of votes this year, especially if Obama wins the nomination. I voted for Nader in 2000, and will vote for him again if Hillary makes a comeback. I don’t think that if Obama wins he should enter the race. But I appreciate his hutzpah. Nader has proven himself more of a man of the people than any of the other 3 candidates, and isn’t that what a president supposed to be? On top of that, who are the Democrats to think that a two party system is their Constitutional right? I think the Founding Fathers would welcome more than two trains of thought, especially when the two ruling parties are at all time lows in terms of popularity with the American people. Of course, the media seeks conflict, not substance, so every story you read about Nader will be about his role as spoiler, not about his bringing to the table major topics such as corporate malfeasance and the situation in Israel and Palestine.

Also, I am a man who enjoys entertainment, Nader will certainly bring that to the table. My hope is that he makes Ron Paul his running mate. That would make this the greatest election in the history of mankind, and we’d see more blimps than we’ve seen since that fateful day in 1937.
RELATED: Huffington Post has a good story about why Ralph running is a mistake.

I don’t really cover a lot of politics here because there are plenty of other places to find that, but with the election coming up it’s kind of hard to avoid, especially because I do like to discuss it. A few days ago, my good friend Parsnip Cabbagepaw, who is a Republican, said that he thinks that Obama is more cult leader than politician. To back it up, he posted link to this column in the comments section this morning. I disagree, but it’s all fine and good. But he then says that the Republicans would rather face Obama than Hillary, to which I say, “You have lost your mind! Sir!” This is obviously the latest desperate Republican spin in a year in which they have almost no chance of winning, barring a catastrophic event. The only thing Republicans agree on in 2008 is Hillary Clinton, and their common bond is a vile hatred of her. She is the only thing that can bring the Republicans out to vote in large numbers, and if Obama does pull off this upset, those same Republicans will stay home. The Boston Herald writer above simply feels what we all feel at some time or another about the people we choose to follow. Is McCain a bitter, angry man who would let that bitterness control his foreign policy? Would Hillary annoy the living s*** out of us with her phony attempts at sincerity? (“I found my voice!”) Hell, I’m sure Obama is a little worried about this responsibility himself. And more importantly, if he is able to run a country anywhere near as effectively he has run his campaign, and if he is able to inspire the country the way he has over the past year, I think it is a chance well worth taking. Your thoughts?

Alright, here’s a list of cool presidential fun facts and worthless presidential trivia that you are sure to impress your friends with at the big annual Presidents Day Party. These are all from the first 25 presidents. I’ll post the 20th century president facts a little later.

• When he was inaugurated, George Washington was down to his last real tooth.
• John Adams last words were, “Thomas Jefferson still survives!” Unbeknowest to Adams, Jefferson had died hours earlier.
• Thomas Jefferson was the first president to shake hands instead of bowing to people. He died deeply in debt, and Monticello was sold off. It went unoccupied for almost 100 years, falling into a sad state of disrepair before it was made into a monument in the 1920s.
• James Madison was 5’4″ tall, and weighed 98 pounds.
• In the election of 1820, the immensely popular James Monroe received every electoral vote but one, and ran for president unopposed. The one elector voted against him so that Washington would be the only president elected unanimously.
• John Quincy Adams had a pet alligator, and had a pool table installed at the White House.
• Andrew Jackson was a chronic drooler, and suffered from the hives. He was orphaned at age 13. Early in life he had smallpox and dysentery. Later in life he had tuberculosis and dropsy. His wife had a nervous breakdown.He was shot in a duel (he killed the guy who shot him), and since the bullet wasn’t able to be removed, he had an infection for the rest of his life.
• William Henry Harrison’s inaugural address was two hours long, despite the fact that it took place in a freezing downpour. He refused to shorten his speech or even put on a coat. He quickly developed a cold, which then became pneumonia, and was dead within a month. His is still the longest inauguration and shortest presidency.
• Martin van Buren’s autobiography doesn’t mention his wife once.
• 20 years after being elected president, John Tyler was elected to the Confederate House of Representatives. He had 15 children by two wives. His first child was born in 1816. The last Tyler child died in 1947.
• Zachary Taylor didn’t vote in the election in which he ran for President. His death is still a mystery. His body was exhumed in 1991 to rule out death by poisoning, but no one is still sure how he died, since the doctors botched the autopsy. The best guess is heatstroke.
• Millard Fillmore’s last words were, “The nourishment is palatable.”
• Franklin Pierce was classmates with Nathaniel Hawthorne and Henry Wadsworth Longfellow at Bowdoin College. After numerous family tragedies, Pierce drank himself to death.
• Robert Todd Lincoln declined his parent’s invitation to attend Our American Cousin the night Lincoln was killed. He was at the train station in New York where Garfield was killed and witnessed it happen. He was at the Pan Am Exposition in Buffalo when William McKinley was killed.
• Andrew Johnson was illiterate until his wife taught him how to read in his young 20s.
• Ulysses S. Grant’s real name was Hiram Ulysses Grant. He changed it because he didn’t want to enter West Point with the initials H.U.G.
• Rutherford B. Hayes won the 1876 election by one electoral vote.
• James Garfield could simultaneously write in Latin with one hand and Greek with the other. He was killed not by the bullet shot by Charles Guitaeu, but by the incompetence of his attending physicians. They continually probed the bullet hole with unwashed fingers and instruments, causing the infection that ultimately killed him.
• Grover Cleveland was sheriff of Erie County, NY. One of his duties was executioner, and he tied the noose and pulled the trapdoor on two convicted murderers.
• Electricity was installed in the White House when Benjamin Harrison became president. He and his wife were horrified at the prospect of being electrocuted, so they never touched the light switches. The lights remained on at the White House during the entire Harrison presidency.
• William McKinley was on the front of the now discontinued $500 bill.

The NY Times has thrown its weight behind the one Democratic candidate who can receive, maximum, 51% of the vote come November instead of the one with an unlimited ceiling. They have decided to support the one candidate who will unite a currently fractured Republican Party. And while running against Obama (anti-war from the start, charismatic) would be extremely challenging for the Republicans, the Times thinks the Dems should support the candidate (Hillary, get ready for more flip flops and icy, angry responses to questions she doesn’t like) that the right wing will eat alive. Of course, if she is elected president, we will get a bunch of new ideas. Oh, never mind, we’ll get one of the two trains of thought that have dominated politics for the last 25 years, the Bush’s and the Clinton’s. I’m sure that a duarchy is just what Washington, Jefferson, et al, were hoping for when they put the country together. This is a disgrace.

If you were one of the few people that had yet to make up their mind about Hillary C., then be sure to watch yesterday’s Meet the Press. By the time it is over, you are going to freaking hate her. She is just an angry, miserable woman. If the Republicans are smart enough to nominate McCain (which I’m quite sure they won’t be), and the Democrats are dumb enough to nominate Hillary (and I’m confident they are), then I will probably vote for him over Clinton. When she loses that election, maybe she and TO can go to a coffee shop and cry their little heads off.

Well, the left wing media and the activist judges are at it again, trying to ruin Christmas. It looks like now they’re trying to kill Santa Claus. Oh sure, the report says that it was drug runners, but we all know better.

But on a (mildly) more serious note, this Bill O’Reilly “War on Christmas” thing is one of the more idiotic ideas his feeble mind has ever come up with. “Merry Christmas” wasn’t even a common phrase until Dickens released a Christmas Carol in 1843, so it’s not like we’re killing off some ancient tradition. And the word “Holiday” comes from “Holy day”, so how are you making this a secular day if you are wishing people a Happy Holy Day? Finally, “X-Mas” is not porn loving left wingers trying to take Christ out of Christmas. “X” is the greek letter “chi”, and for centuries, the Greeks have used XMas as an abbreviation for “christ’s festival”. But perhaps the most sensible thing I’ve come across about this topic can be read here:
…many Christians are genuinely concerned about the secularization and commercialization of the holiday. But for those who truly want to “put Christ back into Christmas,” the answer is in giving more time and attention to religious and charitable activities, not in demanding more Christian symbolism at the place where you shop. Macy’s is not a temple.

Author’s Note: The past two weeks have obviously been a whirlwind for me. Since my interview with Mike Huckabee was posted, The Huck has turned into a juggernaut in the polls- his ratings soaring, his popularity increasing with every hit on johnnygoodtimes.com.

Sure, it was revealed that in 1992, The Huck thought that AIDS patients should be isolated from society… In 1992 I thought that Right Said Fred was going to be the next big thing… we all make mistakes! Irregardless, my article was just the springboard that the Huckabee camp needed.

I would like to say that my piece on Dennis Kucinich had the same effect. However, no one has seen D-Train since he left a Los Angeles nightclub early one morning last week with Owen Wilson and Steve Coogan.

That being said, I was quite disheartened to find that, after a number of attempts, I was unsuccessful in landing an interview with Republican candidate Fred Thompson. His staff declined to arrange an interview, and Fred’s hot wife, Jeri, is quite snippy when you follow her home from her Pilates class.

Needless to say, I was unable to speak with Mr. Thompson. However, not wanting to disappoint my readers, I figured that I would get the next best thing. Knowing that Fred Thompson is, first, an actor, I decided to interview an actor that reminds me of Mr. Thompson, to perhaps get in his head. I found this to be equally challenging. The following actors were either unavailable or unwilling to grant me an interview:

John Voight
Abe Vigoda
Anthony Hopkins
Hal Linden
Anjelica Huston
Kelsey Grammer
Craig T. Nelson

When all hope seemed lost for this week’s column, a miracle occurred. I came across a man who, in this reporter’s opinion, is a carbon copy of Fred Thompson in mind, body and soul.

That man is Conrad Bain, TV’s Mr. Drummond.

Continue reading “Chip Chantry interviews Fred Thompson!” →

-Do you know about the Socialist candidate for Mayor, John Staggs? Darth Ern says the socialist run this town, so this guy’s probably gonna win in a landslide.

-The rumor that could alter the future of America: Is Hillary Clinton a lesbian? And if so, is she really hooking up with a woman this hot?

-The Metro checks in with Sam Katz on election day.

–“For the first time in the history of the Gallup Poll, 50% say they “strongly disapprove” of the president. Richard Nixon had reached the previous high, 48%, just before an impeachment inquiry was launched in 1974.” -in today’s USA TODAY.

-Waterboarding got a soldier kicked out of the army in 1968. Today, it is encouraged by the Bush administration, putting America in some pretty dubious company when it comes to promoting torture.

–This is nuts. You’ll see ROve at the 4:09 point.

–Watch the Frontline on him.

–An article abot him in the Guardian.