What they learned

The contestants were all given the assignment “What I learned from being Johnny G. for a night?” Thus far, four have answered. Here are their replies.

In today’s society, the concepts of honor and justice are as rare as 15 year
olds named Hazel. America’s apathy to morally reprehensible events and actions is, well,morally reprehensible. This culture of indifference pervades every element of our lives, invading our living rooms on the news, cloaking our words,and clouding our decision making abilities.
What we have learned in our first week as Johnny Goodtimes, however, is that
all members of the quizzo community are stripping off this leaden glove of
indifference and grasping for the brass ring of truth, justice and the
American way.
Yes, last week, a great tragedy was averted. The evil falcon of electoral
fraud attempted to swoop in and steal a hard won victory from us. We thank
all of you for speaking up and preserving our triumph.
What they wrote really doesn’t make much sense to me. But damn they’re cute, aren’t they?

Since everyone hates the true/false round anyway, I thought I?d have some fun with it and make it a themed round. As long as everyone had approximately the same chance of answering correctly, what would the harm be? The round is supposed to be the great equalizer anyways. Boy was I wrong, my theme, DotCom Boom or Bust, went over about as well as a narc at a biker rally. So I ruffled some feathers at Locust Rendezvous and Black Sheep, and Johnny gave me a much safer wild card round to do on Thursday. But I?ll tell you what; I miss the anger that was directed at me Wednesday night. The world needs villains like Ken Jennings, the Yankees, the manatee, etc. I think that?s my role, to be the hated quizzo master. I?m sure that this week you?ll enjoy ?true or false, this is the name of a piece of Ikea furniture? and questions like, ?am I wearing underwear??
So that?s what I learned, it’s OK to be hated, and I learned a couple of other things to, most notably that Johnny is weak when it comes to telling women no.
I think the Narc at a biker rally would have gone over a little better Trivia Art’s wild card round. I think his wild card round went over about as well as an adult female on R. Kelly’s tour bus.

The crowd at the Rendezvous is very whiny. And fickle to boot. They jumped
down my throat for asking questions about the Yankees. One gentleman said that
every answer for my round should be, “Who cares? The Yankees suck.” My
favorite was the nice older man who pointed out that a train leaves for NY from
30th Street Station every hour, and I should be under one. But they started to
sing a different tune when they heard the true/false questions about dot com
businesses. Then they all loved me.
Trivia can not be rushed. It must be laid back. If you try to rush it and
adhere to what normal people might call a starting time, then it’s not trivia.
It’s an SAT.
Doug went on to say a bunch of stuff about his car breaking down on the way to Thursday night’s quizzo, but let’s be honest. Who gives a s***?

On Wednesday my mom took me to the bar. I wanted to talk into the microphone where you ask people the questions. There was a man there whowas nice. He told me some questions to say. Then i got to say the questions my mom gave me but only half because of these two girls. I got a little sad but not cried.
Then the man told me that they were pretty and I could see he was right, but
usually they’re gross. <--- I did the letters trick. The girls were also nice. Then a strange man had some fruit but he was nice too. On my trip to the bar to play pretend to be Mr. goodtimes, I learned a lot. First, ther are a lot of nice people in bars. When my mom got too drunk to walk a man even carried her all the way home because he was nice. The questions were hard. When I grow up, I want to be a bar. Before you vote off the Inquizzanator, remember that he does have a disadvantage: He’s out of his f****** mind.