Well, folks, we’re going full circle. I started hosting quizzo as a way to try to break into radio, and after several years, I’m finally getting that chance. After nagging them weekly for years, I think the head honchos at WIP finally gave me a latenight (2-6 a.m.) slot just to make me go away. Squeaky hinge gets the grease, I suppose. I will be also writing on the WIP website, and the crazy hours make doing radio, writing, and hosting quizzo all but impossible. Sadly, quizzo is the one that’s got to go. I’m sure I’ll have a more emotional goodbye in a couple of weeks, when I host my last quiz, but for now I just wanted to share the news.
I will still be hosting a Quizzo Bowl annually, so nothing will change there, and though it’s not yet finalized, it looks like Mike Minion will be taking over several of my quizzes. This is not an immediate departure. I will host two more weeks of quizzo before I step down, and the radio show will not debut until April 15th. I hope some of you will burn the midnight lamp with me from 2-6 a.m. More details on the radio show will be forthcoming. To read Dan Gross’s write up on this news, click here.
IAlthough we will miss you, we are happy to see you get your chacne. However, the Denver quizzo crowd made me an offer to start up an entirely new network of quizzos on the West Coast, strarting in San Diego. Frankly, it is too good to turn down, and to be honest, the weather in Philadelphia as compared to SD made the choice even easier.
Perhaps we should schedule some tryouts to find a suitable replacement quizmaster. We'll talk about it at quizzo this week. Anyone interested?
I am sure JGT and I will have a lot more to post after we talk.
April Fools
Always pleasant when someone spoils the joke for the readers yet to come.
April fools?
Coincidentally, I will no longer be playing Quizzo because I am too busy with my new underwear modeling gig. Jackass.
Coincidentally, I will no longer be eating food because I am too busy with the image of Hunter modeling underwear.
By the way, “burn the midnight lamp” is one of the worst turns of phrase I've heard in a while. I know you wanted to avaoid the cliche “oil”, but phrases become cliches because they sound good and make sense. Burn the midnight lamp? What the hell does that even mean?
If it ever actually comes down to making the choice, maybe you should give up writing instead of quizzo.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kbRlgEK27Jg
Indeed. I get all my tips on grammar and compositon from a guy who was stoned most of the time, used heroin regulary, and died under, shall we say, questionable circumstances. I admire his musical talent and would love to be able to play guitar with even a fraction of his skill and dexterity, but I'm not sure he's the person to cite as an example of clarity.
Stick with quizzo, JGT. And rapping, of course. The world would miss that; at least I know I would. Moreover, that's one field where it's actually a bonus to have limited writing ability.
This infuriates me. I helped build the iSportacus empire that has springboarded JGT to a career in radio. WIP gives him a 4-hour show and all I get to do is sell coffee in the parking lot. Ridiculous.
Don't worry, BMT. There are some of us who don't forget the little people who helped us and supported us on our way up. Or should it be plural, “ways” up? No matter. I'm prepared to offer you a position as a research assistant for my planned book as soon as the final details are arranged with my publisher. (See below.) So you won't have to sell coffee, but I'm afraid I will insist that you make it, as well as perform a variety of other degrading and subservient tasks, such as running errands and washing my car. I will offer you a competitive salary, paid vacations and a 401(k), but I'm afraid you'll have to get your health insurance on one of those government exchanges.
Is true. BMT and Bob both have blueballs. They are typical American assholes who don't use Cossack labor to clean their cars. Nor will health insurance provide the same life-changing benefits afforded by the sage and protocols Dmitri. Eliminating blueballs is same as washing car except for giant American big breasted sluts.
Bah! Is not April Fool joke magic secret protocols of Dmitri. Is true that Bob and PalestraJon and BMT should learn protocols and not waste energy on stupid website but spend time to boff sluts with big breasts trapped and enslaved through Dmitri's system. Then no more blue balls. Is very economical and thousands satisfied customers.
Coincidentally, I also have news on this momentous day. I will no longer be leaving comments on the JGT website. I have received a seven figure advance to write a definitive treatise on current politics and affairs. My working title at this point in time is “The Correct Way to Think About Every Subject in the World, or Why People Who Disagree With My Politics and My Opinions Are Fools and Assholes.” I will be burning all my midnight lamps and oils, indeed I will be burning them at both ends, and I will not have any time to waste on unimportant people such as you buffoons.
You forgot to mention your impending move to Massachusetts so you and PalestraJon can finally tie the knot.
There is no truth to the rumors of a romantic affair between myself and PalestraJon, but we have been discussing the possibility of cohosting a talk radio show. The major sticking point at the moment is that I would like it to be called “The Bob and PalestraJon Hour,” and he prefers “The PalestraJon and Bob Hour.” He is also adverse to the idea of working for Fox News, but I think we can work that out by promising him an opportunity to meet Laura Ingraham.
Funniest thing you've ever written, Bob. Seriously. That was good.
Well thank you, assuming your compliment is not another April Fool's day joke, but I think my continuing work blaming Donovan McNabb has been much better.
I have to admit, JGT, you had me going with your little prank. Well done. But I should have seen through it at once and realized how absurd it is that anyone would ever offer you a paid position.