-Finally, a convenient place to keep that shotgun. I’m pretty sure this is real.
-Philly gets dumped on by Sports Illustrated twice this week. First, the NBA preview issue comes out and the Sixers are declared the worst team in the Eastern Conference. Then, they do a piece on Top 10 cities in a sports slump, and Philadelphia comes in first. It’s raining, we’re ugly, and our sports teams suck. There’s only one person that can break us out of these doldrums: Billy Ocean!
-As many of you know, I drive the sweetest ride in town, a 1997 metallic blue-green Crown Victoria. It scores me a lot of leg. But if you wanna be as awesome as me, you better hurry. They ain’t gonna be makin’ Crown Vics much longer.
–Manayunk is being bombarded by toolbags relieving themselves in public, proving once and for all that Manayunk is the open air outhouse of the Philadelphia Metro Area.