Around the Horn, brought to you by Dwayne Schintzius

Miss New Jersey released those blackmail photos this morning and, are you ready for this, they include one dude squeezing her boobs, one guy biting her boob, and her kissing another guy!!! OMG, that is like so grounds for, like, whatever. That whore! I thought she only loved me!

-You know how I did that thing on Lawchair Larry last week for the Metro? Well, I have an unbelievable update. A guy in Oregon went up in a lawnchair last week, though he got the proper permits, etc.

-Not to self: If involved in an elaborate plan to rob a bank, do NOT allow the other robbers to tie a time bomb around your neck. There is a chance it could end badly. I think I smell a Darwin Award winer.

-From Dan Gross’s column, I learned that Stephon Marbury will be promoting his new sneakers tomorrow at the Franklin Mills Mall. I have become quite a Marbury fan in the last year due to his attempts to make affordable shoes “kool” and stop the senseless mindset that somone needs a $180 pair of shoes to succeed in basketball or be popular. I blasted Lebron “Shill” James for his ignorant statements about those shoes a couple of months ago.