State of the Union

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First of all, congratulations to Free Netflix and Older Men, above, who finished 2nd at the Urban American, one spot ahead of Steve-O and two members of the Lambda juggernaut that won Quizzo Bowl V. (The chick lit category was apparently not in Steve-O’s wheelhouse.) The chick lit round also stirred up a hornets nest at the Bards, as Goodtimes suspended Sofa Kingdom member Garbo for immediately knowing the answer to every single chick lit question. While he may play at quizzo this week, he may not play with the Sofa Kingdom, due to his shameful performance in the Chick Lit round. As for the Ugly American, it’s going really well. We had about 25 folks the first week and about 30 the 2nd week, so we’re getting there. Hope to see even more of you this week. Dollar off every draft beer during the quiz. It is also definitely your best shot at getting a seat. I also like the fact that I am plugged into their sound system and can walk around, Phil Donahue style, with the cordless mic.

I am hoping to have the website redone in the next week or so. When I do, I think I’ve found a new motto. I was directed to this Yelp site recently, where someone was asking about quizzos. A man who refers to himself as the Bald Buffoon wrote: I’ve seen Johnny Goodtimes…I thought he was slightly better than average, but still pretty lame. That is simply the perfect JGT motto: Slightly better than average, but still pretty lame.

Finally, comedy show tonight at the Khyber. The drinks are obnoxiously cheap (I think it’s$1 PBRs and $2 Lagers) and it’s gonna be a great show, with some of my favorite local comedians, Aaron Hertzog, Eric Todd, and John Kensil. There are also rumors of me in a shower scene. If you haven’t been to the Chip Chantry One Man Show yet, I highly recommend it. Very funny stuff. 8 p.m. $5 cheap.

Scoreboard, Brought to You by Freddie Gage’s Latest Album

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O’NEALS (74.2)*

  1. Dork Sided 84
  2. Tooth Wind and Fire 80
  3. To Be Announced 71
  4. Liz is an Idiot 70
  5. Bastard Children of Claire Huxtable 66

BARDS (96.6)

  1. Sofa Kingdom 107**
  2. Narotyzing Dysfunktion 107
  3. L. Ron Hubbard’s Diabetics 93
  4. Beefeater Gin 92
  5. Stefania Knows Best 84

LOCUST RENDEZVOUS (89.8)

  1. The Jams 116
  2. 1022 85
  3. Magnus ver Magnusson 83
  4. But my Mom Says I’m Cool 83
  5. Asparagus 82

BLACK SHEEP (83)

  1. Duane’s World 105
  2. Catdog 91
  3. Party 86
  4. Visit isportacus.com. Yeah! 67
  5. No Thrill w/o Bill 66

UGLY AMERICAN (66.8)

  1. L. Ron Hubbard’s Diabetics 90
  2. Free Netflix and Older Men 75
  3. Lambda 71
  4. Not to Late to Go to Quizzo at Roosevelt’s 50
  5. Mike’s B****** 48

BARDS (89.8)

  1. Sofa Bomblets 112
  2. My Dad Has an Amazing Body 93
  3. I Don’t Even Know U & You’re Already Creepy 84
  4. Lee Carvallo’s Putting Challenge 83
  5. The Hair Lipped Reminders 77

*I’ve started keeping bar scores. Average of the top 5 scores, and top average wins that week. Bards Tuesday wins this week.
**Sofa Kingdom defeated the Dysfunktion in OT with the year Spencer Tracy was born. Kingdom guessed 1898, Narcs guessed 1892, and the answer was 1900.