O’NEALS

1. Not Carrying Your Dead Weight 78
2. Why’s John’s Rum Gone? 70
3. This Is What Happens Larry 57
4. This Is Not a Bus 56
5. Balzac 48

BARDS

1. Hurley Needs a Cool Codename 88*
2. Sofa Kingdom 88
3. Shut Updike 62
4. All the SIngle Ladies 56
5. Western Omelette 53

LOCUST RENDEZVOUS

1. The Jams 88
2. 1022 75
3. No One’s As Irish As Barack Obama 67
4. Jessica Simpson Hearts Cheesesteak Soup 58
5. Michelle the Legend 57

BLACK SHEEP

1. Duane’s World 97
2. Cat Dog 87
3. The Filers 67
4. No Thrill w/o Bill 64
5. Smells Like Mice 59

GOOD DOG

1. Fort Awesome 86
2. Homosexual Agenda 83
3. Weak Stream 83
4. How Big Is Your Stimulus Package? 80
5. Shomer Shabbas 70

BARDS

1. Sofa Kingdom 114**
2. Eschaton 103
3. Lamda Lamda Lamda 102
4. Hurtin Bombs 95
5. Pre-Teen Pregnancy Pact 88

*Almost pulled off one of the biggest chokes in quizzo history. After blowing a ten point lead in the final round, we went to double overtime. Question was, “Kurt Warner has the record for most yards in a Super Bowl. How many yards did he throw for?” Gabe said “414”. He was right, and the Sofa Kingdom had no clue. However, Gabe inexplicably said it so loud that the Kingdom heard, so we went to triple OT, and Hurley Needs a Codename was able to win it then.
**Busiest night of the year at the Bards Thursday. Crazy packed. And I had to pay out $30. A damn shame. For the record, Tues./Wed.’s quiz was a fair amount harder than Thursdays.

O’NEALS

1. But Why is John’s Rum Gone? 97
2. This is Not a Bus 84
3. Brief Interviews W/ Hideous Men 79
4. Dork Sided 77
5. City Lickers 2 66

BARDS

1. The Narcotyzing Dysfunktion 105
2. Sofa Kingdom 104
3. A Good 8 Yr. Old Doesn’t Need a Mom 84
4. Emo Lawns Cut Themselves 80
5. Chablis 60

LOCUST RENDEZVOUS

1. The Jams 102
2. We Have Nothing to Fear, But the Aliens 96
3. 1022 91
4. Trust Us We Know 89
5. Dan and Kristy Forever 86

BLACK SHEEP

1. Duane’s World 97
2. Always Money in the Banana Stand 92
3. Green River Wolves 70
4. The Nordiners 67
5. Air Jordan 62

GOOD DOG

1. Guantanamo Bay Packers 117
2. Barack Steady 106
3. Invincible Ignorance 104
4. Where the Hell Are my Friends? 91
5. Young Jeezy 76

BARDS

1. The Hurtin Bombs 119
2. The Sofa Kingdom 114
3. Lamda Lamda Lamda 107
4. Just the Tip 97
5. Happy Wrong # By the Sea 93

O’NEALS

1. Dorksided 101
2. Why’s John’s Rum Gone 91
3. Same As Last Week 87
4. Young Old and Restless 86
5. A Whole Bunch of Nothing 82

BARDS

1. Narcotyzing Dysfunktion 100
2. Beauties and the Beast 83
3. Just the Tip 76
4. If you Get Beat By Us, Don’t Procreate 61
5. Cheese Balls 52

LOCUST RENDEZVOUS

1. The Jams 106
2. The Casket is Lined With Fine Corinthian Leather 97
3. Playoff Beards 95
4. 1022 95
5. Trust Us We Know 88

BLACK SHEEP

1. Duane’s World 100
2. Urkel’s My DD 83
3. The Genus Edition 81
4. Pull My Finger 75
5. Six Days Left 72

GOOD DOG

1. Lord Chesterfield & Windsor Court 87
2. Idle Time Between Shots 85
3. Invincible Ignorance 76
4. 2nd Place Stormy 60
5. The Lushies 55

BARDS

1. Sofa Kingdom 111
2. How Much for a Flight to the Hudson River? 100
3. Sodomy: A Long-Standing Tradition 99
4. Hurtin Bombs 98
5. Cutz Dat Flo 90

O’NEALS

1. Dorksided 107
2. Lord Moustache Rides Again 89
3. Where is Thumkin 79
4. Face Cracker 77
5. Sue Pete 49

BARDS

1. Hurtin Bombs 107*
2. Sofa Kingdom 107
3. Narcotyzing Dysfunktion 98
4. Marley Dies in the End 95
5. Tim Tebow’s V-Card 89

LOCUST RENDEZVOUS

1. The Jams 108
2. Pussycat Dollz 104
3. 1022 96
4. I’m the One With Stigmata 87
5. Tango and Cash 78

BLACK SHEEP

1. Duane’s World 112
2. Catdog 109
3. We Can’t Win at Fergies 107
4. 13 More Days of Bush 98
5. Sexual Chocolate 66

GOOD DOG

1. Cherry Hill Vitamin Shoppe 110
2. Fightin’ Quakers 99
3. Lord Chesterfield 88
4. Touched by Wong 86
5. Axis of Evil Knieval 85

BARDS

1. Hurtin Bombs 116
2. Western Omelette 108
3. I’m Worried About Coop 89
4. Just the Tip 84
5. Ninja Turtle Pizza Cheese 70

*Won on tie breaker question: In what year was Jeff Bezos born? Sofa said 1955, Bombs said 1964. It was 1964.

O’NEALS

1. No Means Anal 96
2. Elizabeth Kostova 89
3. Johnny and Art Share a Watch 85
4. Sue Went Back to Work 84
5. Society Hillbillies 76

BARDS

1. Sofa Kingdom 96
2. Preteen Pregnancy Pact 91
3. Jessie Spano’s Caffeine Pills 76
4. Cornbread Mafia 71
5. My Couch Pulls Out. I Don’t. 65

O’NEALS

1. Young, Old, and Restless 98
2. Why’s John’s Rum Gone 83
3. Merry Listas 69
4. Murder Book 67
5. Baby Pictures of Ruthless Dictators 53

BARDS

1. Sofa Kingdom 93
2. …Angel Gets It’s Wings 69
3. 13th Grade 66
4. Blue Ball Assassins 65
5. Predictably Last 45

LOCUST RENDEZVOUS

1. Whatchu Talkin’ ‘Bout, Everyone 91*
2. The Jams 83
3. 1022 71
4. Team Estrogen 61
5. I Love Foot Stink 55

BLACK SHEEP

1. Duane’s World 110
2. Sexual Chocolate 98
3. Ze Frosted Umlauts 78
4. Total Strangers 76
5. Who Throws a Shoe? 66

GOOD DOG

1. Invincible 98
2. Cotton Headed Ninny Muggins 86
3. Hanukkah Harrys 84
4. Duck Billed Assholes 83
5. Ignorance 77

BARDS

1. Thank God It’s Them Instead of You 100
2. Hurtin Bombs 91
3. Axis of Evil Knieval 91
4. Just the Tip 81
5. Padma’s Arm Scar 75

*Won the $20 bounty, which they donated to the Covenant House

O’NEALS

1. Why is John’s Rum Gone 114
2. Young Old and Restless 101
3. Federalist Rolling Papers 99
4. Less Than Nothin’ 94
5. Steve O. 91

BARDS

1. Narcotyzing Dysfunktion 111
2. Sofa Kingdom 105
3. Anal Bum Cover 96
4. Acey Douchey 94
5. Re-Sign Pat 93

LOCUST RENDEZVOUS

1. The Jams 114
2. Millions for Defense, Not a Dime for a Senate Seat 90
3. Sunny Never Rises 88
4. Me Fail English? Unpossible 84
5. Grateful Dems 75

BLACK SHEEP

1. Gas Grass or Ass: Senate Seats Ain’t Free 110*
2. Duane’s World 110
3. 25 ta Life 101
4. C-Section 88
5. Senate Seats on E-Bay 85

GOOD DOG

1. Always $$ in the Banana Stand 104
2. Invincible Ignorance 99
3. Where the Hell are My Friends 91
4. Steve O 72
5. Dude Abides 70

BARDS

1. Dimitri the Lover 108
2. Hurtin’ Bombs 103
3. Happy Wrong # by the Sea 87
4. Jewish Mothers 78
5. Dynamic Duo 67

*Won in a tiebreaker. Had to guess what year Johnny the Barback was born. GGA guessed 1983, Duane’s World guessed 1984. The answer was 1981.

O’NEALS

1. We Got Nothin’ 83
2. Why is John’s Rum Gone 80
3. Free shots at Applebees 79
4. This is Not a Bus 76
5. Young, Old, and Restless 71

BARDS

1. Sofa Kingdom 105
2. Re-Sign Pat 57
3. Sloppy Seconds 54
4. Dave’s Angels 50
5. IDK, my BFF Jess? 48

LOCUST RENDEZVOUS

1. The Jams 92
2. But My Mom Says I’m Cool 84
3. Accidental Gunshot Wounds 81
4. Troll Toll 78
5. Trust Us We Know 61

BLACK SHEEP

1. That Team 98
2. Sexual Chocolate 88
3. Duane’s World 86
4. Bollywood Dance Massacre 82
5. Baron Munchausen 80

BARDS

1. Hurtin Bombs 94
2. Christina’s World 91
3. Us and Them 91
4. Extra Large Popcorn 86
5. Dynamic Duo 81

O’NEALS

1. Johnny Hates Rugby 109
2. Why’s John’s Rum Gone 92
3. Young Old and Restless 91
4. Douchebaggage 68
5. Fat Chicks in Party Hats 52

BARDS

1. Sofa Kingdom 107
2. ??? 94
3. Left Hand Shake 76
4. Flailing Tube Man 74
5. Bowling for Kids Sake 71

LOCUST RENDEZVOUS

1. The Jams 114
2. Where’s Johnny? 99
3. Mr. Green Jeans 93
4. Team Ramrod 88
5. 1022 79

O’NEALS

1. Young, the Old, and the Restless 90
2. Why’s the Rum Gone? 87
3. Brains ‘R’ Us 86
4. This is not a bus 80
5. Whimsey McCloud 75

BARDS

1. Sofa Kingdom 104
2. Narcotyzing Dysfunktion 96
3. She Got Ass Rot 70
4. The Nudist Balloonists 58
5. Photo Hunt All Stars 40

LOCUST RENDEZVOUS

1. The Jams 97
2. Trust Us We Know 87
3. The Seawards 77
4. 1022 76
5. Obama Palin 2012 68

BLACK SHEEP

1. Gellin With Magellan 102
2. Duane’s World 93
3. James Joyce Dewitt 91
4. The NumNums 86
5. Third Circus 85

GOOD DOG

1. Invicible Ignorance 95
2. Where the Hell are my Friends 92
3. Shomer Shabbas 84
4. Give Them the Stick 78
5. Jr. League Ladies Club, Obvi., Totes, Holla 72

BARDS

1. Sofa Kingdom 106
2. Zam’s Club 101
3. Hurtin Bombs 99
4. Western Omelette 95
5. BBC, Yeah You Know Me 90