Needless to say, the game went well. The Phillies really put up a spirited fight. But hey, I got a Schmitter and still had a good time. So after the game, me and the crew went to the Cantina, where they have happy hour pitchers of Margaritas for $10. After stumbling out of there, Nate and I were walking at around 12th and Washington when a disheveled, moderately crazy looking guy, wearing three winter coats on an 80 degree day and waiting for the bus with a bag lady, noticed our Phillies shirts. We thought he was gonna ask us for change. “As a Phillies fan for 40 years, can I tell you guys something?” he asked rhetorically and a little wild eyed. “Never go to the businessman special. They always lose the businessman special games. They don’t even try. What was it, 8-1?” We told him yes and he replied, “See, I told you, they don’t even try. You can go to the Sunday day games, but don’t bother with the businessman specials.” The bag lady started screaming madly at him. “They don’t care!! Shut up!!” (You know that optical illusion where one of them is a pretty young lady with a necklace and the other one is an old lady with a bonnet over her head? She looked exactly like that old lady.) He continued. “That was a nice blast by Victorino yesterday wasn’t it? You can go to the Sunday day games, that’s fine. They try to win those.” The bag lady screamed again like a 3 year old. “The bus is here!!!!” “But they always lose the businessman specials. Been losing them for 40 years.” He spun on his heels and hopped on the bus. And that, my friends, is what happens to Phillies fans when they get older. They begin stocking up on winter coats and dating angry bag ladies.
